San Fernando Valley

Chicago, IL

Ask Amy 12-27

AngelaMN, I grew up in a house where three people smoked several packs a day, combined. When I was around 10 years old, one day the smoke *inverted*, so that there was a mist of smoke from the floor to above my head level, and I couldn't get out of it. It was beyond disgusting. I breathed in all that junk from my mother's, stepfather's, and brother's cigarettes. I was an unwilling smoker in that house. If I had relatives who smoked that badly, I'd be hesitant to allow them near my child in a smoking home, too. Could be that woman's daughters are beyond tired of the smoke, the smell, the nastiness in the walls and clothing in their mother's home, that they simply don't want to be around it anymore, nor expose their children to it. It's their right. They should realize how *hard* it is to quit, though. But, *my* mother quit, so I know it can be done.  (Monday Dec 28 | post #25)

Chicago, IL

Ask Amy 12-11

A few years ago, I borrowed a friend's camera for a trip, and she downloaded the pics onto her computer. She also had a group photograph taken of us and a bunch of our friends. I asked her for MONTHS for digital copies (they were all digital, or scannable) and she kept saying she'd get around to it. Finally, I arranged for a visit with her (she lived 3 hours away) and copied the photos of me and the kids at the zoo off her computer. I never did get a copy of that group photo, no matter how many times she said she'd get it to me. The friend ship was dying around then, anyway. I'm not really friends much with any of the people in that group photo now, anyway, but still. The point was, I had to physically go to her house and GET what I kept asking for.  (Friday Dec 11 | post #61)

LA Daily News

Two Valley schools receive Blue Ribbon honors

My son goes to Danube-he's on the Magnet track, and his teacher is terrific. My daughter didn't have as much luck coming out of Danube. But hurrah for all the teachers' hard work. I hope this means the schools are teaching learning, and not teaching to the tests (which every single teacher my daughter had said they had to do, reluctantly).  (Nov 8, 2009 | post #3)

Chicago Tribune

When rent and friendship collide, try to honor your commitments

Katieo, I'm not getting it: did your husband keep driving, and you gave up driving when he was in the car, or did he finally shut-up and stop "back-seat driving" entirely? Sorry, I'm a little slow, too.  (Apr 26, 2008 | post #14)

Chicago Tribune

Parting can bring sorrow to those with unruly hair

Oh, and also what was it that Becky on "Rosanne " did when she farted during a speech? It's been a looong time since I've watched that show.  (Apr 16, 2008 | post #14)

Chicago Tribune

Parting can bring sorrow to those with unruly hair

Jennifer, why DOES a priest wear pink vestments three Sundays before Christmas? Not a Catholic here, so have no idea myself.  (Apr 16, 2008 | post #13)

Chicago Tribune

Close friendships slip away despite woman's devotion -- Arts an...

LW1 is describing marriage - not friendship. It sounds like she's putting too much pressure on one person instead of doing what she really should be doing, which is looking for a marriage partner. In addition to that, it sounds like she needs to take the pressure off and be herself-like Abby said.  (Apr 5, 2008 | post #4)

Chicago Tribune

Birthday celebration reveals marriage headed for trouble

I feel for the kid who has a friend who doesn't drive, yet who feels obligated to pick her up all the time. Unfortunately, if her friend doesn't start ponying up some cash for gas, I think LW2 should do exactly what Ann advises, and show her unless she can chip in for that amount, she won't be able to afford to pick her up nearly as often. Perhaps her friend's mother can drop her off if she's not inclined to help out with gas expenses? Perhaps they're both under the impression that LW2 has HER parent's footing the bill? Either way, it's possible that LW2's friend, isn't really a 'friend'. Maybe she'll catch up after she's able to figure out transportation.  (Mar 15, 2008 | post #1)

Chicago Tribune

Husband balks at second round of in-home in-law elder care

Oh my, WTH. I guess if several siblings aren't able, through distance or house size or job situation or financial situation, they are too selfish to live. Makes me wonder about my cousin, though: she agreed to marry a man who told her that conditional upon their marriage, his father had to move in with them - into HER house. Her husband seems like a nice enough guy, but to anyone else, that would have been a deal-breaker. I wonder if they'll split when her FIL can no longer care for himself completely. I can't see her giving up her work for that.  (Mar 7, 2008 | post #59)

Chicago Tribune

Your Valentine's say

My first serious boyfriend (as in, the first one I'd had intimate relations with) in college, dumped me on Valentine's Day after a year of going steady. He suggested we just "be friends". That was over twenty years ago, but it still smarts. For years I avoided Valentine's Day like the plague. I still prefer not to make a big deal out of it.  (Feb 8, 2008 | post #48)

Chicago Tribune

He says he can no longer endure winter months

I'm a former New Englander who moved to a warmer climate (Southern CA) because, in the end, I could NOT stand not only the short days, but the constant feeling of being cold once the days got shorter. I can see how, if you grew up in a warmer climate, the adjustment would be extremely difficult, especially in Northern New England. That's brutal weather up there. The writer didn't state how old his children are, or how long he and his wife have been married - but I think he and his wife need a long talk about what's going on in their marriage for this one issue to get to the point where it's the deal breaker. He very well might have to move and seperate from his family if he truly cannot stand the climate. A miserable, unhappy father is worse than no father at all. And if he feels he's making all the sacrifices (clearly, they must have agreed he would move because he's not regionally based, so they *thought*) then they really do have discuss their original agreements.  (Feb 4, 2008 | post #18)

Chicago Tribune

Teen upset that boyfriend going away on break

Tanya, it'd be much easier to take you seriously if you a)didn't attack everyone else's opinions and b) didn't use text-speak. You prove all the other points, if you really are under age 15.  (Jan 12, 2008 | post #58)

Chicago Tribune

Wife is facing crucial life choice

I can the Mom's point: sometimes, she just wants to come home, and be with her *family*, which doesn't always include an extra person. She might not have the energy to expend on an extra person all the time. She might not be an extrovert. I don't recall if she said what the age of her son's girlfriend was, but perhaps she should declare the rules, and stick with them: she doesn't want to come home to find an uninvited guest, and cook for an extra person. Perhaps she should consult the school counseler about this girl, and leave it for the counselor to find out what's going on with this girl's family. Clearly, the Mom never set boundries, nor let her son know what was or was not acceptable. She needs to start doing that *now*.  (Jan 11, 2008 | post #10)

Chicago Tribune

Teen upset that boyfriend going away on break

Perhaps the boyfriend's parents take him away for a long vacation with the dual purpose of seeing his relative AND getting clear of the girlfriend as well? They may accept her, but they might not want their son to be too closely involved with a girl just yet. They may have plans for him that include higher education - not knocking up a girl by "accident ". Although, I hear it's common practice for folks with relatives in other countries to take long holidays back in their country of origin. It may not have anything to do with her. LW2: She says she's tired of the routine of having to get home by 5:30 to serve her husband dinner. It sounds like he's very traditional, or at the very least tradition bound, and she's just starting to realize what a trap that can be - living for the man and not for herself. I think a lot of people here gave good advice. But, like so many men in middle age who ditch their wives, she might have to do the same thing.  (Jan 5, 2008 | post #14)