Sexual life after prostate removal

Posted in the Human Sexuality Forum

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What to do

Warrenville, IL

#1 Jun 24, 2009
This post is for all the men who have prostate cancer or are worried about prostate cancer. One of the most feared side effects of therapy for prostate cancer is the impact on sexual health.

The net effect of someone having their prostate removed is:
1) He will lose the ability to have an ejaculate, and will be sterile. You can still have children with your own sperm by artificial means.
2) He will maintain full sensation of the penis. With masturbation or other stimulation, he will still have the ability to have an orgasm.
3) He will probably lose the ability to get a firm erection after surgery. I have had many patients who kept their erections with robotic surgery, but this is not the rule. With time he will hopefully get his erections back normally.

Factors that are responsible for the ability to get erections are:
1) Preoperative function- Surgery can not help erections. If they are not that good to start, then they are less likely to come back.
2) Age- The older the patient, the more they need the nerves working perfectly to have erections.
3) Other medical problems- Illnesses that affect erections such as diabetes and high blood pressure will not help.
4) Frequency of intercourse- The more sexually active the person is, the better the recovery rate.
5) The ability of the surgeon to spare the nerves. If the cancer is such that the nerve shouldn't be spared, erections are less likely to come back. If the cancer is such that the nerves are able to be spared, then technical factors such as how much tissue is saved, using less cautery in the areas of the nerve bundles, and stretching the nerves less all play a role in recovery.
John

Warrenville, IL

#2 Jun 25, 2009
After surgery my member will only get partially erect now, and I'm afraid now most women would not like to have sex or oral sex with me, when I come to a orgasm no semen comes out now but my orgasms are very intense and last up to 20 seconds sometimes, has anyone else noticed this that has had there prostate removed?
Sam

League City, TX

#3 Jul 7, 2009
John wrote:
After surgery my member will only get partially erect now, and I'm afraid now most women would not like to have sex or oral sex with me, when I come to a orgasm no semen comes out now but my orgasms are very intense and last up to 20 seconds sometimes, has anyone else noticed this that has had there prostate removed?
Its probably a turn off for all women if it cant get hard...
Linda

League City, TX

#4 Jul 7, 2009
I would like to suck one and see if i could get it hard..
Terry

Warrenville, IL

#5 Jul 20, 2009
my erection is about 3 inches now after surgery.
looks like I'm doomed now for any sex.

I have no ejaculation either, but when masterbaiting I can get a orgasm to last 30 seconds and it still pulsates very intense below.

Has anyone else had the same experience.
Jess

Warrenville, IL

#6 Aug 6, 2009
Looks like not to many have had it removed, or to comment.

“Gravity is a drag!”

Since: Jun 09

Washington, DC

#7 Aug 6, 2009
Sam wrote:
<quoted text>
Its probably a turn off for all women if it cant get hard...
Same here.
Tracey

United States

#8 Aug 6, 2009
Linda wrote:
I would like to suck one and see if i could get it hard..
I sucked one once. This guy told me he had had his prostate removed and could come but not ejaculate. I'd never heard of it, but his dick was plenty hard and the no come was nice. None in my mouth and no post-coital drain. It was nice. It's too bad my new BF dumps loads.
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Gary

Sun Prairie, WI

#9 Aug 9, 2009
Tracey wrote:
<quoted text>
I sucked one once. This guy told me he had had his prostate removed and could come but not ejaculate. I'd never heard of it, but his dick was plenty hard and the no come was nice. None in my mouth and no post-coital drain. It was nice. It's too bad my new BF dumps loads.
I have no ejaculation either after my prostate removal, Im working on getting it hard agian.

Used to be 7 inches now i get about 4 to five.

one thing tho the orgasms are long and awsome now.
Judge Roy Bean

Los Angeles, CA

#10 Aug 9, 2009
Gary wrote:
<quoted text>
I have no ejaculation either after my prostate removal, Im working on getting it hard agian.
Used to be 7 inches now i get about 4 to five.
one thing tho the orgasms are long and awsome now.
Gary, let me ask, have you tried Viagra? Or, do you take testosterone? Hopefully, things will improve.

I've read where most Doctors recommend not having the prostate removed for just that very reason, plus incontinance is ofter a problem afterwards. For that reason, I don't even let them stick a finger in my rear, or smear crap on those mail-in paper things.
Terry

Houtzdale, PA

#12 Aug 30, 2009
Looks like us men are doomed after having our prostate removed.
Larry

Manchester, NH

#13 Sep 1, 2009
Linda wrote:
I would like to suck one and see if i could get it hard..
Linda, I'd be happy to let you try as I am having my surgery in October 09 and well, I've had a million thoughts about how I will make out with this.
Jeff

League City, TX

#14 Sep 9, 2009
I hate having a limp peter now that no one wants..
beryl

Leduc, Canada

#15 Jan 25, 2010
Is it possible for a man to have an orgasam following the removal of his prostate using oral sex. would possible nerve damage effect penile sensation
Jim

League City, TX

#16 May 27, 2010
beryl wrote:
Is it possible for a man to have an orgasam following the removal of his prostate using oral sex. would possible nerve damage effect penile sensation
Yes and now they are very intense
Cindy

Suisun City, CA

#17 Aug 14, 2010
I have a life-long friend who had his prostate remoned in Nov 09. To date, he still doesn't get erections.
We met a few weeks after his surgery. Yes, I think it had been about 3 weeks and one thing led to another. I was COMPLETELY satisfied because he's the only man who has ever known how to please me. With or without an erection, I find him desireable, passionate and because I feel the way I do for him, that's all I'll ever need.
For the record, I did pleasure him orally, also. It was his first orgasm since the surgery.
Still, he's finding it hard to believe I'm still so attracted to him.
Don't give up guys! Treat her like she should be treated, love her every other way and don't be bitter. She'll find you attractive and desireable regardless of what's in your pants. If she doesn't, move on. She's not worth it to begin with!
bob

Los Angeles, CA

#18 Aug 26, 2010
i had my prostate removed two years ago. at first it was a "soft on" but now with levitra it stays hard for penetration. i haven't had intercourse with a woman however
as my wife divorced me a couple of months after surgery and it is dificult to date etc. with this condition. i was wondering if there are any dating sites with woman who are aware of the men having had surgery and are willing to date a guy and see what happens. it would be easier to date woman who has knowledge of my condition and is willing to date so that when the moment comes it is not a surprise and shock and would make it more likely to have an erection because it would not be that embarrasing if she already knew and was willing to understand and help.
gigi

Paterson, NJ

#19 Sep 7, 2010
Cindy wrote:
I have a life-long friend who had his prostate remoned in Nov 09. To date, he still doesn't get erections.
We met a few weeks after his surgery. Yes, I think it had been about 3 weeks and one thing led to another. I was COMPLETELY satisfied because he's the only man who has ever known how to please me. With or without an erection, I find him desireable, passionate and because I feel the way I do for him, that's all I'll ever need.
For the record, I did pleasure him orally, also. It was his first orgasm since the surgery.
Still, he's finding it hard to believe I'm still so attracted to him.
Don't give up guys! Treat her like she should be treated, love her every other way and don't be bitter. She'll find you attractive and desireable regardless of what's in your pants. If she doesn't, move on. She's not worth it to begin with!
Amen Sister , My man can satisfy me without a hard on thats because I know he loves me and always will ,we have been together over 20 years...he is not selfish and i come first, he can get me off just by kissing me ..
tom-- in minnesota

Shakopee, MN

#20 Sep 22, 2010
I lost my prostrate, about 4 years ago. Which was 6 months before I got married, so far my wife doesen't even touch me, and I think sex life is over. I tried the pills that are supposed to make you erect, by each time i used them, when i blinked things turned blue, not good said the doctor. Next I tried the injections, not fun, even when the pharmacy sends you triple the size needle, either way, not fun and only 1 out of 10 shots worked and that was in the doctors office on the test. I've tried the pump, which does increase the size, only problem, I find is getting that tiny rubber band off the tube with out the shock of it snapping around the shaft, that and you only have about 30 minutes before brain dead sets in, I've tried watching porn on the tv, i can achive the orgasm, not as fun alone, but it does take some time. Dr's is there any other thing out there that might help?
my 2 cents worth

Brookville, OH

#21 Oct 3, 2010
I couldn't have my prostate removed due to having had surgery for an abdominal arterial anurysm. They found the AAA doing a CAT scan for prostate removal. Saved my life!!! I had to have Brachian Therapy (seed implantation) instead.
I can't get an erection even with ED pills.I can play with "willie" soft and have fairly long, intense orgasms that are totally dry. No mess!! I have friends who have had their prostates removed and they have the same problem. One went so far as to have a penis pump installed!! He says don't do it! I won't because I'm separated now and don't use it anymore except to pee. But I'm glad to be alive after all I've been through.
My doctor said I was lucky that the anurysm didn't blow!!(it was 8cm) I would have been dead on the spot!! So I guess you could say that prostate cancer SAVED my life!! Hang in there guys!

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