accidental touching of gentials?

I had a massage last night and when she was working on my thighs she touched my genitals, two times. This has never happened to me before. I have had many massages. At first it seemed like an accident, but after I thought about it, it seems like she would be more careful. She could lose her license if I made a complaint.

Should I file a complaint against this massage therapist?

I wouldn't, unless she did something truly egregious and overt, like actually fingering you. If she just brushed your genitals while working your thighs it may well have been unintentional, or she may just have thought you were comfortable with casual contact of that sort. If it had been a male masseur, I'd hold him to a different standard, but given that it was a female, I'd think you should cut her a bit more slack. At minimum, I'd say you should talk to her and say, "I wasn't comfortable with what happened" and give her a chance to apologize or explain before you take an action that could cost the woman her livelihood.

Morgan wrote:

I wouldn't, unless she did something truly egregious and overt, like actually fingering you. If she just brushed your genitals while working your thighs it may well have been unintentional, or she may just have thought you were comfortable with casual contact of that sort. If it had been a male masseur, I'd hold him to a different standard, but given that it was a female, I'd think you should cut her a bit more slack. At minimum, I'd say you should talk to her and say, "I wasn't comfortable with what happened" and give her a chance to apologize or explain before you take an action that could cost the woman her livelihood.

Why do you consider ethics, or professionalism for that matter, to be gender-biased? No competent therapist "accidentally" touches the genitals. Period.

Thanks for your reply. I decided to just drop it. But I won't have another massage with her.

Female MT-
I appreciate your comment. I did feel violated by this massage therpaist.

I strongly agree that no competent massage therapist "accidentally" touches the genitals. And what does being "comfortable with casual contact of that sort," mean? I would not say that touching of the genitals is casual contact.

I didn't mention that the MT was sloppy in how she drapped me during the massage which may have led to me being touched in my genital area. I thought she was trying to be less abrupt and sensitive but maybe it was overtly being innappropriate.
I read in another thread here, that
"Most(massage) schools will teach proper draping to protect the therapist, and protect you from being molested. In Ohio, improper draping, which leads to improper touching is grounds to get the Medical licensed ripped from them."

This is reassuring.. but as I can see now there are some very bizarre and unprofessional practices that are happening. This is my first negative experience with massage therapy. This is damaging my perception of the MT field. I had respect for it and now I don't.

suzy wrote:

I didn't mention that the MT was sloppy in how she drapped me during the massage which may have led to me being touched in my genital area. I thought she was trying to be less abrupt and sensitive but maybe it was overtly being innappropriate.
I read in another thread here, that
"Most(massage) schools will teach proper draping to protect the therapist, and protect you from being molested. In Ohio, improper draping, which leads to improper touching is grounds to get the Medical licensed ripped from them."
This is reassuring.. but as I can see now there are some very bizarre and unprofessional practices that are happening. This is my first negative experience with massage therapy. This is damaging my perception of the MT field. I had respect for it and now I don't.

Suzy, please don't let this experience deter you. Massage Therapists who subscribe to the AMTA Code of Ethics can be found on the AMTA web site at www.amtamassage.com
I and other ethical therapists have been fighting the good fight on this forum with horndogs and pervs who think that draping is "unnecessary" and that every massage should have a happy ending. Licensed therapists like myself are very similar to Physical Therapists in what we do. We just use different techniques. We don't appreciate being derided because of the fact we are one of only a few medical specialist fields where we actually touch the patient. Please, try another massage from a professional.

Excuse me, that should have been www.amtamassage.org

Thanks for your reply. I will check that website.

I never knew that any massage therapist didn't use draping and I never heard of a massage therapist being expected to provide a happy ending. This is all new to me. I guess I will have to be more careful now. The person I had this "bad experience" with was doing chair massages in Whole Foods. After the 10 minutes, she asked me if I wanted to book an appointment. I don't even know if they should be allowed to illicit business that way. I should have listened to my instincts and not booked. I really didn't know her credentials but assumed Whole fods would monitor the people they have come in there.
Up till now I have had a high level of respect for massage therapists on equal par with physical therapist, like you said. I will just have to be more careful now.

Suzy, please don't even bring up LMT practices in Ohio! Regardless of your views on massage therapy, the Ohio based LMT nazis will try to open up a can of whup-ass on you. Stay with youer MTs in NJ and just go find another and not let one experience fog your overall judgement. Just don't go to Ohio!!!

What are the Licensed Massage therapy practices like in Ohio?

To respond to the earlier poster's question, neither ethics nor professionalism are gender-based, obviously - but I do think it would be worse if a male masseur brushed a female client's genitals than if a female masseuse did. I am not saying it would be appropriate in either case, or a good thing in either case - but I do think it would be worse if it were a man touching a woman, and more likely to be a deliberate sexual act rather than clumsy accidental contact.(You're right that no competent therapist accidentally touches the genitals - but if a female therapist touches a female client, I am more willing to chalk it up to incompetence, while if it were a man touching a woman, I'd be more inclined to suspect deliberate misconduct.)

And as for the original poster's remark that this one bad experience "is damaging my perception of the MT field. I had respect for it and now I don't," frankly that's preposterous. That's like saying that because you got food poisoning at one restaurant you will never eat at any restaurant again, or because you were sexually harrassed by one boss you'll never work in a job again. One bad massage therapist is one bad massage therapist, not an indictment of the entire field.

suzy wrote:

What are the Licensed Massage therapy practices like in Ohio?

We are licensed and regulated by the State Medical Board. The physicians on the board did not want massage therapy in Ohio to be performed by people who do not know the anatomy and physiology of the body, or conatraindications to massage, or pathology of disease processes. Our training is 750 hours of these subjects, plus one semester of ethics (including DRAPING!!!), business practices, massage techniques, and orthopedic testing and assessment.
MiamiRT has posted many offensive and insulting threads on this forum. He wants massage to be performed by unprofessional laypersons who treat the client like a pole dancer who is there for their voyeuristic fantasies. He has asked professionals if they have fantasies about what lies beneath the drape, and whether we have ever taken a peek under the sheets. So as you can see, his opinions are those of a childish perv who can never be a professional and who therefore tries to dispense with all professionalism.

opinions, opinions.
Suzy, like Morgan has stated, go get another massage from a licenced MT and enjoy yourself. All massages are different, so go in and tell them what you want. Of course LMT will reply that I am telling you to get a happy ending, when nothing could be further from the truth.

suzy wrote:

I had a massage last night and when she was working on my thighs she touched my genitals, two times. This has never happened to me before. I have had many massages. At first it seemed like an accident, but after I thought about it, it seems like she would be more careful. She could lose her license if I made a complaint.

The question here is, did you like it?

if you feel trespassed then you should not be posting this thread around and you already call the nearest masseuse-police. ayt?:D

I guess you are having 2nd thoughts now buddy?

I had a similar experience just recently even. I am here for something very similar what happened to you. I wanted to know if this is common or not.

I went for my massage tharapy appointment with a male therapist. H asked me undress and lay on the table while was reading some paperwork. I was laying there on my back trying not show the embarrassment I was feeling about being nude like that with a man, but trying to be brave with my penis showing was difficult, yet it seemed somehow rude or even more embarrassing if I left my butt sticking up if I turned over.

After all the waiting there in the nude, I got an erection. I just felt uncontrollably aroused from the start and it was involuntary. I am not gay.

Ahyway ater suffering the embarrassment of the nudity, and an erection, he asked me turn over, face down ANYWAY!

Now was butt was facing up and I was still nude, he never did cover me, plus he massaged my bare butt a lot and I thought with too much cream, as well to deeply between my butt cheeks. Don't ask me why, but I could not fight that this aroused me more.

So he asked me to turn over finally, and my erection was still full and bobbing around while he massaged me, I noticed that he would massage my inner thighs in a way that he touched my testicles everytime he got close, as well as his forearm resting on my erect penis and when he would move his hand massaging my hips, stomach and thigh areas, his arm rubbed my penis like contant.

I like vI would orgasm because of this, and especially because the hairs on his arm were tickling me vthere too. So I tried to think of other things, but it got impossible. I was really embrrassed this whole time being naked and having this all happen with a man there. I thought that he would think I was gay by all of this.

Anyway, horros of horros, I orgasmed on his arm and my stomach. I felt like disappearing right then, but being a professional, he didn't even say anything, and he used a towel cover it me and wiped it all off, and his arm too. Then he just finished doing my legs and feet. I felt so gay about everything and like he thought I was gay and wanted it.

Should I be embrrassed to ever get a massage again?

To Jeff and Suzy.... I don't want to start a flame war, but come on, you guys and gals are adults, no? You can actually ask to be covered if you are not confortable being naked, and you can ask not to be touched "there" if it does not feel good to you.

I once received a massage from a male massotherapist. He did not offer to cover me up and I did not mind, I rather enjoy being nude during a massage. But during the massage he started oiling my butt crack and started rubbing my most private of holes! I tensed up my butt muscles and politely ask that he *not* stick his fingers there. From that point the massage stayed completely profesionnal.

I'm pretty sure that I would have wound up with some fingers up my butt and a masturbation if I had said nothing....

Your body is your temple! Don't be a victim out of politeness... If something does not feel good, whatever it is, speak up. If the masseuse/therapist does not listen, you can always get up and leave. Speak up!