Take Jon back and get some counseling

Dear Kate- I really feel that you should earnestly consider reconciling with Jon, as hard or impossible as that may seem. Seek the help of a professional Christian counselor and a Pastor you both can trust for guidance and support. Forgiveness begins with a decision of our will, not an emotion or a feeling. In the long run, it will be the best thing for your children and for your lives as well. You will have to "start over" from ground zero, but if are both of you are willing to lay down your differences and all the hurt & pain, God can heal your lives and help you pick up the pieces and put things back together. I know, because I speak from personal experience. I have had you on my heart and don't know how to get this message to you.