A quick guide on how to bathe a cat:

A quick guide on how to bathe a cat:

1. Scrub toilet and flush several times.(You may consider this step optional.)
2. Fill toilet with warm water and add a squirt of pet shampoo.
3. Drop cat in toilet and slam lid shut.
4. Sit on lid. Cat's efforts to free itself will generate a good deal of sudsing and washing motions.
5. Flush toilet a couple of times to rinse the cat. NOTE: Hold securly to leash attached to cat in toilet.
6. Leap off toilet seat, dash out the door, and slam it shut securly, because kitty will erupt from the bowl as if jet propelled.
7. Leave kitty to sulk and dry himself.
8. Bask in self-congratulatory haze.

You are either a very sick individual or you have a great sense of humor. Hope it's the latter!

kitty wrote:

A quick guide on how to bathe a cat:
1. Scrub toilet and flush several times.(You may consider this step optional.)
2. Fill toilet with warm water and add a squirt of pet shampoo.
3. Drop cat in toilet and slam lid shut.
4. Sit on lid. Cat's efforts to free itself will generate a good deal of sudsing and washing motions.
5. Flush toilet a couple of times to rinse the cat. NOTE: Hold securly to leash attached to cat in toilet.
6. Leap off toilet seat, dash out the door, and slam it shut securly, because kitty will erupt from the bowl as if jet propelled.
7. Leave kitty to sulk and dry himself.
8. Bask in self-congratulatory haze.

Thanks for the info. Every time I try to bathe whiskers she goes ape sh*t on me. I'll have to try your method, sounds like a great idea :)

Using the washing machine has the same effect. Don't turn it on and sit on top, or turn it on. Whatever makes you happy. I do not recommend putting the cat in the dryer, I prefer the hanging from a clothesline method

you all are old school, I duct tape mine to the car windshield wiper and send it through the automatic car wash. sure it's 7 bucks, but two birds, one stone, and all that.

old school wrote:

you all are old school, I duct tape mine to the car windshield wiper and send it through the automatic car wash. sure it's 7 bucks, but two birds, one stone, and all that.

Hope you don't opt for the hot wax.

I wish some people had the balls to post there real name when they put ignorant stuff on here. I would go to kitty's house and pound the teeth out of his head. This site should be closed down.

Damn cat lovers!

I prefer to put a large stone or a cinder block in a gunny sack, drop the cat in and tie the sack shut.
Then, I drop the sack in the nearest river.
I don't know how clean the cat gets that way, but it sure stops the Damn thing from crapping in or around my house, tearing things up, killing song birds and spreading the many diseases cats carry.
Oh and Brucewayne O'Dell
Anoos Compound
Lilo-an, 6002
Philippines

too buku wrote:

I wish some people had the balls to post there real name when they put ignorant stuff on here. I would go to kitty's house and pound the teeth out of his head. This site should be closed down.

too buku wrote:

I wish some people had the balls to post there real name when they put ignorant stuff on here. I would go to kitty's house and pound the teeth out of his head. This site should be closed down.

you're very violent! Please stay away from our very clean kitties!

funny stuff!!!!!!!!!!

i like to lick my wife's kitty clean.with my tongue.

kitty wrote:

A quick guide on how to bathe a cat:
1. Scrub toilet and flush several times.(You may consider this step optional.)
2. Fill toilet with warm water and add a squirt of pet shampoo.
3. Drop cat in toilet and slam lid shut.
4. Sit on lid. Cat's efforts to free itself will generate a good deal of sudsing and washing motions.
5. Flush toilet a couple of times to rinse the cat. NOTE: Hold securly to leash attached to cat in toilet.
6. Leap off toilet seat, dash out the door, and slam it shut securly, because kitty will erupt from the bowl as if jet propelled.
7. Leave kitty to sulk and dry himself.
8. Bask in self-congratulatory haze.

A 5 gallon bucket works as well....Get three five gallon buckets each filled halfway full, put a couple drops of pet shampoo in the first bucket; drop cat in first bucket, after about 5 minutes slightly crack lid and drop kitty in second bucket (clean water); repeat step 2 for third bucket. All the shampoo should be agitated out by frantic motion of kitty, if not repeat step 2. This method works great for me.

The devil has cats....God has dogs!

Fact wrote:

The devil has cats....God has dogs!

Let me back up this statement....

I have never seen a seeing eye cat, a drug sniffing cat, a rescue cat, a cat that has served in WW2 or VN or any war, a bomb sniffing cat etc....

I have seen a cat high on catnip and acting irrational. It is also well documented that cats kill for the sport, not for food....So cats are evil felines walking around high on catnip killing whatever they can...what a great pet...<sarcasim>

too buku wrote:

I wish some people had the balls to post there real name when they put ignorant stuff on here. I would go to kitty's house and pound the teeth out of his head. This site should be closed down.

If im not mistaken you didn't put your name down either.

Fact wrote:

<quoted text> Let me back up this statement....
I have never seen a seeing eye cat, a drug sniffing cat, a rescue cat, a cat that has served in WW2 or VN or any war, a bomb sniffing cat etc....
I have seen a cat high on catnip and acting irrational. It is also well documented that cats kill for the sport, not for food....So cats are evil felines walking around high on catnip killing whatever they can...what a great pet...<sarcasim>

I would like someone to take care of me and pay all the bills while I get high all day. Just dont like bath day.

wow. i can't believe how tough all of you are. i mean it takes a really tough person to abuse a cat. or even better talking about abusing a cat. you all are a bunch of sick fu$&S with the exception of too buku. and i agree with too buku maybe some of you should post your names and we can see how tough you are when you are on the receiving end of the beating.

WOW wrote:

wow. i can't believe how tough all of you are. i mean it takes a really tough person to abuse a cat. or even better talking about abusing a cat. you all are a bunch of sick fu$&S with the exception of too buku. and i agree with too buku maybe some of you should post your names and we can see how tough you are when you are on the receiving end of the beating.

Hey man....I didnt say anything bad.

If my cat was the size of my lab, she would eat me.... and my lab!

trotsy wrote:

If my cat was the size of my lab, she would eat me.... and my lab!

No, she wouldn't eat you, just kill you for the sport of it...LOL