Pedophiles in Salina

Can anyone tell me why, in this state, county, and city are child molesters and child rapists allowed to live right next door to a day care center, a half block from a park, and another day care center a half block away? In this case, this evening I saw him standing on the sidewalk talking to one of the neighborhood children, bent down to her level,(she's 4) smiling away, trying to make her feel comfortable with him. It was all I could do not to sic my dog on him. What's wrong with this picture??? Is anyone else as outraged as I am? By law, I can't say anything to him, because that would be harrassment. He has the right to live anywhere he wants. What about our children? Don't they have the right to be safe? People, look up FamilyWatchDog.com . Become familiar with the perverts in your neighborhood. Watch your children. This isn't 1950's America anymore. Be aware.

This will probably drop a bomb on this thread, but I am a recovering pedophile and was a child molester.

I am not going to defend the man who was talking to the child. But I can shed some light on both sides of this issue.

First, I have determined that I will not EVER touch another child sexually or allow myself to stay with a child in a private place. I do not go to places or web sites where there are likely to be many children and they are not allowed in my house or on my property. Here are some pros and cons:

The man you saw was, at best, very unwise and at worst may still be active. He should stay away from children.

I believe that laws prohibiting convicted pedophiles from living in sight of schools or day care centers are wise for all parties concerned. However, laws should not impose crazy distences either (1,000 feet or half a mile). Anyone can drive a car and get to a school if they want to. The idea should be for them not to want to.

I also want to draw a line between pedophiles (people who are sexually attracted to children) and child molesters (people who actually have sex with children). There are pedophiles who do not touch children sexually just as there are "normal" people who never rape women.

It is also a fact that pedophiles do not decide to be attracted to children. Whether we are born with a certain gene or whether it is the way we were raised I do not know. It makes no difference; we do not choose it. I have wished many times that I did not have this curse.

There is also a lie that I want to counter. Child molesters do not always re-offend. In fact there have been many studies of recidivism rates for all types of crimes and the rate for all types of sex crimes, child molesters included, is 15% after five years. This is the second LOWEST rate of any crime. Only murder has a lower rate.

To answer your question:
<Can anyone tell me why, in this state, county, and city are child molesters and child rapists allowed to live right next door to a day care center, a half block from a park, and another day care center a half block away?>
Yes, your community could use a law; perhaps excluding us from a four block radius. Write your city officials or the local newspaper. I would vote for that (if I could vote).

I will watch this thread and answer any reasonable questions or comments. But if you flame me you only prove your own stupidity and hate. Thank you.

Okay, Old Fogie, I'll give you that. But in my experience and knowledge of any child molesters I've personally known, they never stopped. It went on and on and their families enabled it, mostly through denial. In my case personally as a victim, it just makes more common sense to me to have persons who commit sexual crimes against children to live farther away than next door to day care centers and parks. Why isn't there a law? I know they can travel to offend, but isn't living right next door putting it right in their faces? We don't have enough people to monitor them, so why put their prey within such easy reach?
I'm glad you have no plans to re-offend. Maybe you're one of the few. If I upset you, that doesn't make me stupid or hateful. That makes you defensive. This is an inflammatory subject. Not everybody respects offenders. I get defensive, too, but I was a victim and I see how it damaged me from the age of 3 on up. It withered my soul. I'm still trying to "get over it". It causes physical and emotional problems to this day. It hurts my heart that it happened to me and others who were too tiny to defend themselves.
I will try to get this out there so that maybe we can get a law enacted. You keep educating and I'll keep watching. How 'bout that? I can't believe I'm crying at this point. Well yes, I can. It still hurts that much.
Hopefully, this thread won't bomb. More people need to talk about this.

Laughing_Spider, no you are not filled with hate or stupid. You didn't flame me, and in your case I wouldn't have blamed you if you did. You suffered because of people like me and can still go beyond hate. I really respect you for that.
One of the factore in my being able to overcome the temptation to molest children was finding out the damage that sex at too early an age can inflict on children. I had thought that I hadn't damaged anyone because I had talked them into it and not violently raped them. Then my therapist explained that I was teaching them that sex meant love and that anyone who offered sex loved them.
I believe that everyone starts out with a conscience and when they learn to overcome what their conscience tells them they feel guilt.
You did bring up a good point. I was not saying that a child molester only commits one crime and then quits. I was talking about recidivism after incarceration. I don't believe that a child molester can stop on his own. I believe that he needs to have his nose rubbed in his mess as I did. He needs to realized that he has committed a crime and must stop. But on the other hand he doesn't need to spend many years in prison (depending on whether he is physically dangerous).
I agree that your city needs a law limiting how close a convicted child molester can live to a school, park or day care center.
I think maybe this conversation could be good for both of us. Thank you for showing me a little about the "other side" of the coin.

Thank you for that. I do have one problem with the recidivism rate that you mentioned. I think it's higher than that, and many, many cases are never reported. I've read studies that state it's 30 to 40%. Who really knows? I think it depends on who is doing the study. In my case, it was a sex-is-love thing. I don't need to tell you what happened after that. It was a long downward spiral. I've worked with children who act out, rage at others, cut themselves, set fires, wet the bed, on and on. Almost all were molested at an early age. Many adults still do those things. Some go on to commit sexual crimes, some do not.

Anyway, I just want to find a way to stop the pain these children go through or prevent it altogether. There are child porn rings that circle the world. It's out of control. I just want to protect these children, and I don't think just prayer will do it. The problem is, I don't have any confidence to get up in front of people to tell them these things. I freeze up. It's from being emotionally beat down if I spoke up, occasionally physically. I have panic attacks. Generalized anxiety disorder. Insomnia. Chronic pain disorder. I took all those awful things and turned them inward. It was my fault. I was stupid, couldn't do math, lied all the time, was ugly, but during the abuse, I was suddenly pretty, smart, good. Imagine my little girl confusion! A couple of run-away attempts and two suicide attempts later, I got older and drank way too much. Did some drugs, had lots of relationships that didn't quite ever work out. Three marriages. I'm a f-ing mess! So you see why I have no self confidence. I was considering suicide a couple of weeks ago.(I'm okay now.)

So how do I help stop this shameful, sickening, painful-till-you-die exploitation of little children? Write a book? Would the Pedophiles and Molesters read it? Doubtful. How can I help slow down this tsunami of abuse? I know, there I go being all melodramatic, but dammit, I'm frustrated!

Laughing,
I sent a long post offering some suggestions, but they didn't put it on - possibly because I suggested that we meet in Second Life (secondlife.com ) where I am Timmy Ivanovic (not my real name). I thought that would allow us to talk without cluttering up the forum and yet still offer complete anonimity for both of us. So this will be my last post here (On your thread).
But my advice is that you do write that book if you wish. I would read it, and I would recommend it to my former therapist for use with other pedophiles.
But more than that you could analyze your thoughts and feelings as you write.
Also, in your life, try to concentrate on what is good about your life, not on how terrible you feel.
You will be in my prayers.

Most likely I will. I've been doing research for so long, I can't see why no one else sees this stuff. It's right there!

Okay. Sorry to hear you're going. I thought your ideas and mine could mesh into a fine book. I need to do some more thinking about it.

I had a couple of posts that weren't put on, too. I guess they just didn't go through. It wasn't any thing inappropriate.(From what I've seen, about anything goes. Maybe I will meet you in 2nd life. Sorry I dumped all that emotional garbage on you last time. It just kind of spilled over.

Till we meet again...

Looks like the pervert is still up to his old tricks. He says he's cured,...HE'S NOT !

laughing_spider wrote:

Can anyone tell me why, in this state, county, and city are child molesters and child rapists allowed to live right next door to a day care center, a half block from a park, and another day care center a half block away? In this case, this evening I saw him standing on the sidewalk talking to one of the neighborhood children, bent down to her level,(she's 4) smiling away, trying to make her feel comfortable with him. It was all I could do not to sic my dog on him. What's wrong with this picture??? Is anyone else as outraged as I am? By law, I can't say anything to him, because that would be harrassment. He has the right to live anywhere he wants. What about our children? Don't they have the right to be safe? People, look up FamilyWatchDog.com . Become familiar with the perverts in your neighborhood. Watch your children. This isn't 1950's America anymore. Be aware.

Unfortunately, we cannot lock them up on their own little island and let them kill each other. You're right, the only thing we can do is be sure WE protect our own children. Especially young parents who let their small children run anywhere they please. They need to open their eyes, because if they aren't watching them, those predators are...