Gossip, Lies, and trouble makers

Posted in the Ripley Forum

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“Peace, Love, and Happiness”

Since: May 11

Location hidden

#1 May 18, 2011
Why cant people live their own life and leave me and my family out of it? I am not going to lie, I did gossip about people and stated the facts that I knew but I no longer do it. I am better person and I need to think about me and my kids. What people did in their past is that and people change so get over it.
hmmm

United States

#2 May 18, 2011
Well said...but that's all ppl thrive on around here is someone's past. No one can remember the good ppl have done but can't forget the bad. I made my mistakes when I was younger but I straightened my life up and now have a gorgeous son and don't do anything anymore. But ppl still wanna bash me for what I DID! It's just ppl who have nothing better to do with their lives

“^..^Train Driving Dawg^..^”

Since: Feb 11

Wanna Blow, My Horn?

#3 May 18, 2011
Peace, Brothers and Sisters of Topix, the love dog is here to anwser your prayers! A big wet smooch to everyone.....:-P

“Peace, Love, and Happiness”

Since: May 11

Location hidden

#4 May 18, 2011
There is this one person I want to apologize to and I hope they read this. I apologize for the things I have said and relayed to a certain someone. You know who you are and you know who I am.

If you would please contact me and i have something to tell you.

Since: Nov 10

United States

#5 May 18, 2011
Just remember this: "Your past does NOT determine your future."

“^..^Train Driving Dawg^..^”

Since: Feb 11

Wanna Blow, My Horn?

#6 May 18, 2011
proudmommy2002 wrote:
There is this one person I want to apologize to and I hope they read this. I apologize for the things I have said and relayed to a certain someone. You know who you are and you know who I am.
If you would please contact me and i have something to tell you.
You sound like a nice person proudmommy2002, everyone makes mistakes its how you correct them that matters, good luck to ya.:-)

“Gravity keeps EVERYONE down! ”

Since: May 11

Location hidden

#7 May 24, 2011
proudmommy2002 wrote:
There is this one person I want to apologize to and I hope they read this. I apologize for the things I have said and relayed to a certain someone. You know who you are and you know who I am.
If you would please contact me and i have something to tell you.
I agree, you character is how you deal with conflict. I sure wished I knew who the one person was or who you are so I could tell them and you guys could work this out. You can send me a private message on here, I'd be glad to help!
No way

Germantown, TN

#8 May 24, 2011
Just remember this. Everything that happens in the past determines everything that happens in the future.

Since: Nov 10

United States

#9 May 24, 2011
It doesn't have to though. With hard work and determination, you CAN change your life. Look at JUDGE MATHIS. He had a HORRIBLE past and if I'm not mistaken, he was convicted of a felony. But he straightened up, got an education, and look where he is now.

Now I'm sure that when he decided to change his life and was going to school, there were a lot of people from his past that tried to thwart him with taunts and even tried to keep him down. People who hated him and tried their best to keep him from making a better life for himself because they remembered him from his old ways. But he hung in there and now he is reaping the fruits of his labor.

Unless you have murdered someone and are sitting on death row, you still have a chance to turn it around. You cannot let the people from your past who judge you decide your future for you. It is up to you to let them or not let them. People can only do to you what you let them do. You are the only one who has control of you and your life. You may not have control of your surroundings, but you DO have control over you and your life.

Since: Nov 10

United States

#10 May 24, 2011
...AND who you allow the PRIVILEGE to be IN your life.

“I find no solace in solitaire”

Since: Dec 10

Location hidden

#11 May 24, 2011
Your lesson is an important one. Obviously you would feel better had you displayed an empathetic stance for others BEFORE someone turned the gossip tables onto you.

But that's not the end of the world. Changes really can only happen ONE person at a time. And your change is apparent.

Do what I do...when you are around friends or family, and they bring up the Story of the Moment, remove yourself from the situation. No reason to scold them or correct them...believe me, they will get the picture.

For years now, when I go any visit for the holidays in my hometown Small Town, USA, my relatives will say, "We have to wait and talk about that when Bob's not around".

I like that sentiment a lot, and the only way I know to change others is to change Me. Good luck to you!

Since: Nov 10

United States

#12 May 24, 2011
Sorry, Bob. Never meant to scold everyone here. I just want people to know that all is not lost, especially the people who are unjustly judged here in our esteemed county because of their pasts.

I have noticed that, here in Lauderdale County, anybody with so much as a bug stain on their past who dares try to turn there lives around and become better people, get better jobs, get saved, etc. Has it rough because there are a lot of people in this county who absolutely WILL NOT let them. They just won't let go.

Once there is a judgment made about you, people here actually cling and hold onto your past sins because they don't want you any other way and because they want ANY EXCUSE to keep you down.

And they make it rougher on you because they KNOW you are trying to do better and they do not want you to do better. Because if you do, then it would make them wrong about you. You would be showing them up...taking the wind out of their sails.

Nobody likes to eat crow. People WANT to be right about everything. It is only when you know the inner workings of people around here, that you can know what to expect from them and not let them discourage you and cause you to fail.

Wishing you the best that life has to offer.

“I find no solace in solitaire”

Since: Dec 10

Location hidden

#13 May 24, 2011
musicluvr wrote:
Sorry, Bob. Never meant to scold everyone here. I just want people to know that all is not lost, especially the people who are unjustly judged here in our esteemed county because of their pasts.
I have noticed that, here in Lauderdale County, anybody with so much as a bug stain on their past who dares try to turn there lives around and become better people, get better jobs, get saved, etc. Has it rough because there are a lot of people in this county who absolutely WILL NOT let them. They just won't let go.
Once there is a judgment made about you, people here actually cling and hold onto your past sins because they don't want you any other way and because they want ANY EXCUSE to keep you down.
And they make it rougher on you because they KNOW you are trying to do better and they do not want you to do better. Because if you do, then it would make them wrong about you. You would be showing them up...taking the wind out of their sails.
Nobody likes to eat crow. People WANT to be right about everything. It is only when you know the inner workings of people around here, that you can know what to expect from them and not let them discourage you and cause you to fail.
Wishing you the best that life has to offer.
Music,

I'm really sorry, as I wasn't clear at all. My post was to the OP only. My point on scolding was that if I do that, rather than just leaving the room, I end up looking like a self-righteous asshole, rather than someone with good intentions of ending the gossip cycle. That was purely about me.

I agree with everything you wrote here, and nobody gets more furious than me at how a small town DEFINES someone, without all the facts.

One other example is being defined solely by who one is related to, friends with, or even their neighborhood.

I can't tell you how refreshing it was for me to move to a big city, and be able to make my own individual impression on people. Those people had no preconceived notions of my relatives, my past, or my intellgence/personality type.

Even though all of the above things were judged "good" where I came from, I was still not seen as the individual I wanted to be. I was considered a "big fish", but the pond was tiny. And my "big fish" definition was NOT about the person I was...it was much more about income, family roots, and reputation. I was one of the lucky ones...but I had many opportunities to see those who were very unlucky...and I've always been an empathetic person, so that alone showed me that the small town definitions are unfair, and highly limiting.

Sorry again for the misunderstanding! I should have quoted the OP and didn't.
No way

Germantown, TN

#14 May 24, 2011
musicluvr wrote:
It doesn't have to though. With hard work and determination, you CAN change your life. Look at JUDGE MATHIS. He had a HORRIBLE past and if I'm not mistaken, he was convicted of a felony. But he straightened up, got an education, and look where he is now.
Now I'm sure that when he decided to change his life and was going to school, there were a lot of people from his past that tried to thwart him with taunts and even tried to keep him down. People who hated him and tried their best to keep him from making a better life for himself because they remembered him from his old ways. But he hung in there and now he is reaping the fruits of his labor.
Unless you have murdered someone and are sitting on death row, you still have a chance to turn it around. You cannot let the people from your past who judge you decide your future for you. It is up to you to let them or not let them. People can only do to you what you let them do. You are the only one who has control of you and your life. You may not have control of your surroundings, but you DO have control over you and your life.
Read with comprehension.

Since: Nov 10

United States

#15 May 24, 2011
Hey, Bob. I understand completely. Sorry, I misread. And you were very smart to leave here.

I had been an Army brat and had lived all over the country when I moved to Lauderdale County. I was up in grammar school when I moved here. So I had lived in enough different municipalities when I came here to know that Lauderdale County is unlike any place I had ever lived. Most, not all (because I have a few great friends and family that live here and there are some really good people here), but the majority of the people here are folks of a different caliber. Here, its all about who you know, what last name you have, how much money you have, or what reputation you have whether it be warranted or not.

Now granted, I'm not a Prater, Crowder, Littles (no offense to these families) but these are the few families who have been unjustly labeled in this town. So Bob, you hit the nail right on the head when you gave the example about who one is related to.

In my own past situation, I was hated because I wasn't "from the county". I was an out-of-stater when I came here so that made me an outsider. Also, I didn't have "that Lauderdale County mentality". I did not think like these people so I was considered "trash". And I missed out on a lot of opportunities back then. It was only when I moved to Dyersburg in 89' and went to a new school that things got better for me and I was finally able to be myself, speak freely, and do what I want without being criticized for it. I felt like a bird out a cage.

I am now a confident and outgoing 40 year old and I love myself, my family, my friends and my life. I feel I have been so blessed. And I am not afraid to express my own opinions whether on here or in the real world. I have since moved back to Ripley and yeah, sometimes I still get bashed by some people here. But you know what? It really doesn't bother me.

I know I'm a great person. It doesn't matter if the next person thinks otherwise. As long as you have a positive outlook and attitude, things will magically work in your favor. That is proof of God and his Law of Attraction at work.

I love your posts and it looks like you and I think alike.

“I find no solace in solitaire”

Since: Dec 10

Location hidden

#16 May 24, 2011
musicluvr wrote:
I am now a confident and outgoing 40 year old and I love myself, my family, my friends and my life. I feel I have been so blessed. And I am not afraid to express my own opinions whether on here or in the real world. I have since moved back to Ripley and yeah, sometimes I still get bashed by some people here. But you know what? It really doesn't bother me.
I know I'm a great person. It doesn't matter if the next person thinks otherwise. As long as you have a positive outlook and attitude, things will magically work in your favor. That is proof of God and his Law of Attraction at work.
I love your posts and it looks like you and I think
alike.
Very kind of you, and may I say your strong sense of self worth is evident in your posts! Very important quality, and you use it well, while remaining humble toward others.

To clarify one thing. I didn't leave that area specifically. My Small Town, USA was in Mississippi. I live in a TN city now. I came here with a friend of mine a few days ago and have enjoyed the chat! But I really don't know very many people in NW TN. I figure it's extremely similar, in both good and bad ways, to the Mississippi of my youth, however!

Since: Nov 10

United States

#17 May 24, 2011
Names_Bob wrote:
<quoted text>
Very kind of you, and may I say your strong sense of self worth is evident in your posts! Very important quality, and you use it well, while remaining humble toward others.
To clarify one thing. I didn't leave that area specifically. My Small Town, USA was in Mississippi. I live in a TN city now. I came here with a friend of mine a few days ago and have enjoyed the chat! But I really don't know very many people in NW TN. I figure it's extremely similar, in both good and bad ways, to the Mississippi of my youth, however!
Oops. Sorry I assumed you were from here. I enjoyed the chat. Welcome to Tennessee. I wish you the best in your future endeavors. May God bless you and keep you.

“Walk with me in”

Since: Aug 09

Hell, Norway

#19 May 24, 2011
Shut Up Cherie wrote:
Nobody wants to hear this crap! You're still trash whether you choose to believe it or not. Just keep telling yourself and the rest of the world how great, smart, blessed, important you are. And yeah, I think you really believe that. You're that arrogant and self-absorbed.
Come my child, leave the nice people alone. They have done you no harm.

Come set with me for a moment, and i`ll tell you a little story.
dude

United States

#20 May 25, 2011
Huh???

“I find no solace in solitaire”

Since: Dec 10

Location hidden

#21 May 25, 2011
musicluvr wrote:
<quoted text> Oops. Sorry I assumed you were from here. I enjoyed the chat. Welcome to Tennessee. I wish you the best in your future endeavors. May God bless you and keep you.
Hey Music...sorry for the delay. I must've clicked thru this one yesterday without responding. Very kind of you, and I gave you props yesterday for being so kind, in another thread. Hope that was okay.

And the assumption make sense, obviously...why would one come to this forum if they didn't have ties here, right? Well, I'll blame that on Smiles inviting me. lol.

I'm actually from the area of Northeast Mississippi, which isn't so far away. Growing up, we got the Memphis news channels, so you and I were both seeing the world thru the same lens.(Dave Brown is a saint and a prophet!)

Wait, I could be thinking about Dyersburg.....did y'all get Memphis news in the 80's? I'm thinking Ripley is in the "Midsouth" viewing area also.:-)

Look forward to reading you more in the future, ML!

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