NEW CANAAN, the Ivory Tower of Fairfield County

Residents of New Canaan ignore the severe angst their teen kids face : a very narrow minded community, where parents want to ignore that there are geeky kids in their schools,you know the ones, those who are not athletic or intellectually above the rest, and where not all kids are preppy and perfect. Teens struggle to fit in here and there is absolutely nothing for them to do except go and hang out with friends behind the infamous Mobil Station or maybe get drunk or high in Mead Park in the early evening, or even at Waveny Mansion...Hey, they could go and spend lots of $$$ eating out! Where are the cops securing this perfect, idylic town? What are parents to do? Kids don't want to hang out at home, that's for sure, their homes are too beautiful and too perfect, and of course, nobody can say that they are spoiled brats! Where is the balance?

Vivian??? That's quite a post, there!! I would take it more to heart if you were actually registered with TOPIX so thatI may be able to get some insight as to where your information and motivation (for posting this) originate.

New Canaan is like thousand of other towns where there will ALWAYS be kids who 'hang out''smoke pot' and 'drink'. Yes, it's a very affluent town.

I was a student in the New Canaan school system in the 70s. In fact, if you watch the movie 'Ice Storm', the movie was set in that time period.

Kids who hang out in the back of the Mobil station are probably doing no more than that. It backs to the largest public parking lot in town (well - comparable to the one off of Park on the way up to God's Acre). This is a wide open area and, frankly, you'll MORE OFTEN THAN NOT find a couple of NCPD cars in the lot after stores have closed.

It is no more narrow-minded community than most. Kids in high school who are not 'in' go through hell. ANYwhere. Look up the case of John Rice.. A teen who snapped and murdered almost all of his family. He had acne and was over-weight. He was continually picked on. THAT was in the early 70s.

I sense that you have a child (or know a child) who is victim to such bullying. My kid has been, as well. We moved her to a more specialized school.

What 'balance' are you looking for? As a teen driving around in New Canaan, the sport was to spot the Police cars so that we wouldn't get pulled over (we weren't necessarily doing anything wrong - but back then, it was legal to pull people over for 'routine stops').

As for kids not wanting to spend time at home -- look to the parents. As I approach 50 years of age, I am still in touch with many of the PARENTS of my friends (from back then) who were more than happy to have us in. We spent more time going from house to house than anything else. Really: How many 'kids' are there in New Canaan (teens)? If ALL of them were the type to 'hang out and drink', the place would be teeming with kids - and the cops would be on them (!!!).

Kids can stay home - the can go to the 'Outback'- a supervised 'Teen Center' of sorts, where ALL kids are welcome. YES - even the GEEKY ones.

Help me out here ... where does your post come from?

If you doubt, by the way, that the New Canaan Police Department is on the job, go to www.scanct.com - click on the link for Darien/New Canaan and you can here the police and fire radios on-line.

I look forward to your response.

Vivian, you get the writer's award! New Canaan of the 60s/70s certainly harbored the self image of the Ivory Tower; egocentric, provincial and borderline alchoholic. Residents exhibit a rabid provincialism that fortifies their sanctimonious droolings of personal perfection, as if to say, since we are here then here is perfect, like us. I transfered to New Canaan High from one horrible year in a Massachusetts prep school where fist fights were a weekly occurance (I usually won). The implied liberation of the Sixties was always at odds with the presiding pecking order found in most High Schools (1969-1972). Senior Row was a windowed guantlet from one section of the old HS to another--passage was certain to include ridicule, derision and worse. One day, and out-of-character for Bryan, He said to John Rice, "Hey Rice, you're ugly." He snapped, almost removing Bryan's head from his body. Rice's severe potmarked acne had made him an easy target-- with all my strength I could barely remove him from Bryan's prone body. For my efforts as peacemaker I got a week's detention from the balding pricipal. It was said later that Rice butchered his family when they discovered he had murdered young Mary Mount---more graffiti on NC's Ivory image. I spent a lot of time puffing herbs and drinking wine in fabulous, forested retreats without any threats (7 or 8 restricted resevoir areas in Fairfield County) of parents or the law. City cops were by and large deranged high school bullies with residual power-trip delusions--we were at war with these idiots. As for bullies, human nature will always allow them--get used to it.

Austin Maloney wrote:

Vivian, you get the writer's award! New Canaan of the 60s/70s certainly harbored the self image of the Ivory Tower; egocentric, provincial and borderline alchoholic. Residents exhibit a rabid provincialism that fortifies their sanctimonious droolings of personal perfection, as if to say, since we are here then here is perfect, like us. I transfered to New Canaan High from one horrible year in a Massachusetts prep school where fist fights were a weekly occurance (I usually won). The implied liberation of the Sixties was always at odds with the presiding pecking order found in most High Schools (1969-1972). Senior Row was a windowed guantlet from one section of the old HS to another--passage was certain to include ridicule, derision and worse. One day, and out-of-character for Bryan, He said to John Rice, "Hey Rice, you're ugly." He snapped, almost removing Bryan's head from his body. Rice's severe potmarked acne had made him an easy target-- with all my strength I could barely remove him from Bryan's prone body. For my efforts as peacemaker I got a week's detention from the balding pricipal. It was said later that Rice butchered his family when they discovered he had murdered young Mary Mount---more graffiti on NC's Ivory image. I spent a lot of time puffing herbs and drinking wine in fabulous, forested retreats without any threats (7 or 8 restricted resevoir areas in Fairfield County) of parents or the law. City cops were by and large deranged high school bullies with residual power-trip delusions--we were at war with these idiots. As for bullies, human nature will always allow them--get used to it.

The mental picture that you paint is pretty accurate. I was just a couple of years behind you - the 1st class to serve all 4 years in the new high school building.

I had more of my share of the jeers and jabs from the jocks (some of them) and the townies, as I wasn't very 'popular' when I first got to NCHS.

High School is a terrible place for many kids. Anyone who tells you that they loved every minute of it is full of it. I fully understand why my 17 year old daughter comes home crying some days. It seems that kids survive thier peers by torturing them.

In that regard, some things never change. And, New Canaan doesn't hold either a patent or exclusive rights to bullying.

I went to new canaan high school and compared with what ive seen on tv and in other schools, it goes well under the norm for bullying ... never once have i seen a freshman spanked (like in rye, ny) never once have i seen a fist fight due to bullying, and the rumor bullying is getting significantly better as far as im concerned.

Kenny wrote:

I went to new canaan high school and compared with what ive seen on tv and in other schools, it goes well under the norm for bullying ... never once have i seen a freshman spanked (like in rye, ny) never once have i seen a fist fight due to bullying, and the rumor bullying is getting significantly better as far as im concerned.

From what I see - and what I saw in NCHS, the probability of bullying exists everywhere. But, yes - you sre right. New Canaan is on the lower end of the scale, to be sure.

Tobacco-is-our-State-Bird wrote:

<quoted text>
The mental picture that you paint is pretty accurate. I was just a couple of years behind you - the 1st class to serve all 4 years in the new high school building.
I had more of my share of the jeers and jabs from the jocks (some of them) and the townies, as I wasn't very 'popular' when I first got to NCHS.
High School is a terrible place for many kids. Anyone who tells you that they loved every minute of it is full of it. I fully understand why my 17 year old daughter comes home crying some days. It seems that kids survive thier peers by torturing them.
In that regard, some things never change. And, New Canaan doesn't hold either a patent or exclusive rights to bullying.

John Rice, Sr. ran a restaurant downtown. It was not a family who fit in very well. Across the street lived the notorious homosexual, Warren Allen Smith--also Julio DeLaTorre who had left Cuba under suspicious circumstances--was involved in some killings, he later said. Apparently there is no US jurisdiction over such people--maybe someday there will be a "truth and reconciliation commission" in Cuba as happened in South Africa.

Mark Cross wrote:

<quoted text>
John Rice, Sr. ran a restaurant downtown. It was not a family who fit in very well. Across the street lived the notorious homosexual, Warren Allen Smith--also Julio DeLaTorre who had left Cuba under suspicious circumstances--was involved in some killings, he later said. Apparently there is no US jurisdiction over such people--maybe someday there will be a "truth and reconciliation commission" in Cuba as happened in South Africa.

John Rice Sr. was neither criminal or a homosexual.

With all the illegals in the US and especially Connecticut, is there any law enforcement being used to screen them? All a Cuban has to do is reach dry land and he's granted legal status. Casto has let criminals out of jails to end up in the US. In the case with the post on the Rice killing, there is no inferance that Rice, Sr. was a criminal. Probably the influence of a couple bad neighbors was demoralizing to the Rice family. Neighbors make a big difference.

Steve Roberts wrote:

With all the illegals in the US and especially Connecticut, is there any law enforcement being used to screen them? All a Cuban has to do is reach dry land and he's granted legal status. Casto has let criminals out of jails to end up in the US. In the case with the post on the Rice killing, there is no inferance that Rice, Sr. was a criminal. Probably the influence of a couple bad neighbors was demoralizing to the Rice family. Neighbors make a big difference.

That's ludicrous. These murdersd occurred in the very early 70s. My younger brother was 2 houses away being sat for when they occurred. Illegal immigration wasn't an issue then - and is still not a real issue in 2008 in New Cannan Connecticut.

Steve Roberts wrote:

With all the illegals in the US and especially Connecticut, is there any law enforcement being used to screen them? All a Cuban has to do is reach dry land and he's granted legal status. Casto has let criminals out of jails to end up in the US. In the case with the post on the Rice killing, there is no inferance that Rice, Sr. was a criminal. Probably the influence of a couple bad neighbors was demoralizing to the Rice family. Neighbors make a big difference.

I should add: John Rice was an eagle scout -- he was a nerd and often bullied. Whether or not that had anything to do with it, I do not know. But what I DO know is that people in that neighborhood wee not relly close amongst each other. They weren't unkind - it just wasn't set up to be close-knit.

Conspiracy theory closed.

I went to school with John Rice. Yea,he was a little strange but I felt sorry for him, and still do.This happened 4 decades ago,the legal process was completed, and Im sure Mr. Rice dealt with it and moved on with his life as best he could.But the internet has made it possible to, never let it die.Im sure Mr. Rice reads these blogs also,perpetuating the horror,guilt and shame.Its got to be agonizing for him. If I was him,I'd sell my story to Hollywood,take the money and run,all the way to S.America, where a person can truly be anonymous.

leave john rice alone,let the guy live his life in peace.i new john in high school,and i had a crush on him,i thought john was a good looking guy,and as a matter of fact there were other girls that had a crush on john.but john was shy,and he keeped to himself.john was very smart,i would say that john was the smartest in our class at new canaan high.yes i was inlove with john,who knows maybe he didn't like blondes.i always stuck up for john,at new canaan high the kids would make fun of you if you were 5 pounds over weight,alot of new canaan kids were assholes.leave john rice alone,leave him alone!!!!!!!!!! OR MAYBE HE WILL COME AFTER YOU I WILL ALWAYS LOVE JOHN

enough about john rice,leave the guy alone.i went to high school with john,and like john i was made fun of because i was heavy in high school,kids don't know when to shut up.its funny but when i went to a class reunion,all the thin girls got fat and all the fat girls got thin.anyway just leave john alone,one time i was made fun of at new canaan high and john rice stuck up for me ,i was grateful to john.i also thought john was a very kool guy.i found out years later my sister hadcrush on him when john worked at the a&p.