"My First Visit to the Movies" by Kurt Benbenek

Wow! This is great! I'm probably much older than Mr. Benbenek which means I remember the Arden Theater like it was yesterday.

My first movie memories are more along the lines of Clark Gable and Mary Pickford, but I also saw "Gone with the Wind" in it's hey day

thank you -
this entry is marvelous!

Clayton Counts

Ah, Benbenek - nicely said!

Wish I could have seen those swell movies also!

Mark

Thanks, guys.

I know that I'm a convicted sex offender, but I hope you won't hold it against me. I have fond memories of the Arden, holding hands with my highschool sweetheart, Jeff P., as we watched clasics like "Sunset Boulevard" and "Dr. Zhivago" in the darkened aisles.

Magical times, full of wonder. Speaking of, I wonder what Jeff is up to these days. Memories...

This is literally TOO SWEET for words! I too have a grand regard for "Gone with the Wind" yet have never seen it either (such as Kurt Benbenek)

Please visit my website

April Winchell (it's all about me)
http://www.aprilwinchell.com

thank you!

Irwin,

Sorry about the "technical geek talk" but...

Yeah, the awesome thing about these little message board places is that they basically "harvest" names and topics...not sure how they do it...must be with electronic micro-bots (AKA micro robots)- and of course any dumb dumb with half a brain can use Google and sweep themselves narrowly into any set of limited "terminologies" - ie; "Lynwood", "Benbenek", "Archie Bunker", "Black Sabbath", "clock", "owl", etc

The act (really it's an art) of propagating names and topics is essentially what drives the internet (commerce-wise and otherwise) into mind frenzies (nah, I take that back...)

For instance, large internet entities such as eBay and Amazon.Com place their brand name(s) whenever and wherever they can. The technical term for this is "propagation" (or "meme" swirling)- and as time goes on, this meme swirling is done almost solely by customers.

So it's highly gratifying (and satisfying) at times to see what the little message boards (like this tiny one) are doing. As a whole they tend to swirl memes better than the big boys...and swirl them mightily they almost always do.

(As well as the fact that not a whole lot of people know how to express themselves clearly or cleverly...)

Plus smaller message boards are always a great place to practice typing.

Typing is also what the internet is about. Without typing (and/or keyboards) the internet would simply be a big, bland auction or tool for pleasant government agencies (like the post office)

So the guy who runs the counter's name is John. My friends tell me he's probably from Cambodia and at this point I want to tend to possibly believe them. It's funny, I only buy coffee and never any of the other products

What I did last summer...

1)
2)
3)

Reminds me of that little folded insert that was included in Neil Young's album "Tonight's the Night" (long playing album version 12 X 12)

SECTION ONE

Upon entry (with Guy Stevens of the Bexleyheath Council) we quickly sat down in the lobby. I soon noticed the slow tumbling of the styrofoam cup that'd been wobbling on the very edge of a small "magazine-style" table and that Guy had been clutching (a quarter-filled with lukewarm coffee...and as Jesus paraphrased, "if it's lukewarm" then it should probably be spit out of the mouth. In other words, one needs to know where to draw the line. In other words, write the check or go into debt"

And He placed shutters upon the windows (of his flock) in order to keep the sand out and also to keep the sun from damaging the large John Lennon poster near the kitchen.

Soon after that, Guy left and I was escorted down a long hall by a kind of chicken woman (literally a woman who resembled an actual human-sized chicken...somewhat R. Crumb-esque) holding a wooden clipboard and reciting (by heart) the complete Biblical story of the prodigal son...also stating: "We don't do things in halves here..."

SECTION TWO - COMING SOON!

Mark -

And so the Los Angeles Times fires 250 people, mostly from their editorial department and if you subscribe to the LA Times (I don't but I pick it up once in a while) you may have noticed that the thing has been shrunken a good 18 percent width-wise...and (as you can see) it doesn't look or read well!

Now, if this is a way to cut costs (and it must be!) then what the heck is next?

Is it time to water-down our collective newspaper ink 18 percent, too!

The heck it's not - and if we're this far gone as a literate society (and we're not OMG) then we certainly have a long road to hoe and many hoes to push gently in front of us until we all reach that omnipoetic plateau that Whitman so breathtakingly spoke of and wrote about on his various windowpanes that he had scattered all over the vertical sides of his house (for personal use)

The good thing is that newspapers now exist, however one day they won't (next Friday maybe) and hopefully we will all read what we sow. The End

Dearest Kurt

Great observations...simply great! In this internet day and age and in a world full of dank art galleries and strangers, it's a breath-taking breath of freh-share to intake (OMG!) the often harbinger of your loose truce (on both coasts, mind you! LOL!)- as if that would be all - OMG fer heck's sake.

That being said (actually typed, by me...unless I'm one of those trained outer space monkeys...which honestly I am) I must indeed take issue (LOL!) with that magazine you're holding. By the way what issue is it? And what magazine. And...you get the idea.

They really let people type to their heart's content around here (or is that corn-tent?) don't they????

And in conclusion I say BRAVO and laughing out loud (and laughing out of a lid if you happen to be some sort of grape jelly)

always
Mark the Science Guy

The rocks under Brighton Pier somewhat resemble those under Huntington Beach Pier

Brighton Pier - I know what you mean - far out!

Why I Am From Long Beach?

Yes, I have sex with children. Big deal. It makes me happy. Can a man (or, in my case, lower primate of uncertain sex) be judged on this fact alone?

And it is a fact. Sex with children is what I do best. No, seriously.

Kurt cannot tell a lie.

Even though he was convicted of abducting and sexually assaulting me, I forgive him. He has sexual urges, just like everyone else who has never had consensual sex.

There is a lesson to be learned here. Aside from impersonating people on the Internets, Kurt has many great personality traits. Like for instance, he is able to write Russian novels without actually saying anything of importance. And beyond that, he wins almost every argument he has with himself.

I say "almost" because he hasn't yet convinced himself that he's not a homosexual pederast.

Kurt Benbenek will go down in history as one of the greatest art forgers this world has ever known.

Wait... scratch that. What I meant is that he's one of the world's most obscure pretend artists. But whatever. Even douchebags have a purpose.

Houseplant Picture Studios
Forgettable, Embarrassing Eyesore

Houseplant Picture Studios
Unexceptional "Dadaist" Website

Houseplant Picture Studios
Pointless Vanity Plus Sub-Mediocrity

Houseplant Picture Studios
Humiliating Waste of Bandwidth

Oh, Kurt.

It's so good to see you back in the swing of things! I was beginning to worry about you, since you never have the balls to post anymore. Never did, really... except to other people's websites.

Funny thing is, you've been called out all over the Internet for impersonating people, and then you go and attach your silly little name to a post where, shockingly, you've impersonated people.

And the people you choose to impersonate? They've actually done something with their lives, and received some recognition for work they've done. It's no secret that you would give Gina's corpulent aorta to be more like any one of them.

Jealous much?

Maybe if you weren't so transparent in your methods, some of the things you have to say about people might stick. But you're too much of a retard. I mean it. It's awfully sad to see a grown "man" behave the way you do. Sad, and more than a little pathetic.

So tonight, as you cry yourself to sleep, remember what I told you. You're nobody 'til somebody loves you.

I love you, Kurt, even if nobody else does. And they don't, believe me. Even if you had any talent in that disgusting, greasy, chubby pimple of a head of yours, you'd still be useless to most people, because you truly have no purpose here on Earth.

Maybe in the next world...

Yo, now I'm in New York! Damn, I get around, don't I?! How do I do it you ask? The same way I imprisonate folks all over the internets -- Technology!

Kurt you is outa REHAB! aAnd back on the internets after a long tiem of not imprisonating the pepple you wish you waz cool as. Welcame back and try to Say outa trubbles. U my HERRO!!!

I just wanted to apologize for wasting everyone's time, sabotaging their web sites and Wikipedia entries, forging posts and generally being an all around Rupert-Pupkin wannabe. It's sad, really. Or it would be sad if it weren't so funny.

Anyway, I think the best thing to do at this point is eat myself to death, which I started doing about 4 years ago. It would be going a lot faster if my girlfriend Gina hadn't picked the padlock on my pantry, but what can you do?

So thanks for all your identities. I'll see you in the sweet hereafter, a Hostess fruit pie clutched in each hand, and a cassette tape of Toga Party crammed up my popper.
God speed.