Nightmare of loss has no ending

You people are very ignorant...Not only are you disrespecting the dead by your comments, but you are now blaming an innocent victim for doing what most would consider the act of a good samaritan...
I didn't see much about the "good samaritan" in the Bixby Halloween case deserving to be shot and killed....nor should I have. To imply that someone deserved to be killed for breaking up a fight (regardless of who is involved) is absurd and shows no regard for human life. Don't fret, I'll pray for you.

lbcer wrote:

<quoted text>
Hmmm,and beside police chief and presidential front runner don't forget the most sucessful of celebrities(WINFREY),
Top pro golfer(WOODS),top fortune 500 CEO of Merril-Lynch(E.O'NEAL),let alone the thousands of doctors, professors, nurses etc. There is no glass ceiling anymore for blacks more like plastic wrap now.

It is folks that make your comments untrue, because of people with attitudes like you, African Americans, who gave so much to make life better for you, and to allow you to speak the venom that you espouse, still have to be caution because of their skin color. EVERYONE wants to imitate African American life, styles, etc, you know... be like MIke, but in your hearts you still have that supremist attitude. I find it most in those who could not afford an African American housekeeper to instill better values in them. Would you prefer this young man have crossed the border illegally in a cargo container or in the trunk of a car, and then took to the streets saying loud I am Illegal and Proud? If more folks had the values of African American, the courage to stand for what is right, then maybe our skin would no longer matter.

The summary of this article seems to be that the mother of the deceased is upset because people believe that her son was a gang member. The facts speak for themselves. He hung around with gang members in his home, associated with gang members, and when a gang fight broke out, he got involved. Now how could any one NOT come to the conclusion that he was a gang member.

From the report, Long Beach PD did an excellent job. The perpetrator was arrested, tried, and convicted to 60 plus years in prison. That is a very successful outcome.

Your loss and grief is understandable. Your denial in the face of facts that you son was very probably a gang member is also understandable especially if it makes you feel better. Your trying to convince others that he was not a gang member is UNacceptable.

Learn from what happened but don't try to change the facts (which is a VERY common theme whenever a gang member is killed, they all of a sudden are described as having been saint like). When you refuse to accept the facts and refuse to take action to prevent them from happening in the future, you are doomed a repeat of the same actions (in other words, you had better start working on you stepson, although it might be too late).

Long Beach police is good for calling everything gang related... I grew up in Northlong Beach and I faced the same problems growing up there also.. Gangs, Gangs and more gangsters on a daily basis and I think LBPD needs to stepup and protect their city like Orange County does. We can't go over there without getting harrassed... Believe that. Police see a black, u are getting pulled over. Why not the same in LB. Marcus

SMH at Ignorance wrote:

You people are very ignorant...Not only are you disrespecting the dead by your comments, but you are now blaming an innocent victim for doing what most would consider the act of a good samaritan...
I didn't see much about the "good samaritan" in the Bixby Halloween case deserving to be shot and killed....nor should I have. To imply that someone deserved to be killed for breaking up a fight (regardless of who is involved) is absurd and shows no regard for human life. Don't fret, I'll pray for you.

If discussing the TRUTH about what happened here is disrespectful to the dead, then allow us to be guilty as charged of disrespectfulness. We cannot help this woman now. We can only discuss what may have prevented it, and hopefully some poor single mother in a gang infested neighborhood will read our words and begin TODAY to work her way out of that situation before she loses her son too.

>To imply that someone deserved to be killed

Speaking of ignorance, ignorance also covers one's ability to comprehend what is written. No one EVER wrote that Darnell DESERVED to be murdered. Everyone has been saying that the MURDER was predictable and avoidable due to his getting involved. Understand what you read, and please avoid replacing words in our thoughts to satisfy your own hate.

As to bringing the Halloween incident into this fray... nice try at playing yet another race card where it doesn't apply. You lose. Again. Doesn't it get tiring?

This is about parenting, not race. Grip.

Marcus McCain wrote:

Long Beach police is good for calling everything gang related... I grew up in Northlong Beach and I faced the same problems growing up there also.. Gangs, Gangs and more gangsters on a daily basis and I think LBPD needs to stepup and protect their city like Orange County does. We can't go over there without getting harrassed... Believe that. Police see a black, u are getting pulled over. Why not the same in LB. Marcus

Perhaps because the Long Beach Police Department trains it's officers to follow the 4th amendment?

Hmmm wrote:

<quoted text>
If discussing the TRUTH about what happened here is disrespectful to the dead, then allow us to be guilty as charged of disrespectfulness. We cannot help this woman now. We can only discuss what may have prevented it, and hopefully some poor single mother in a gang infested neighborhood will read our words and begin TODAY to work her way out of that situation before she loses her son too.
>To imply that someone deserved to be killed
Speaking of ignorance, ignorance also covers one's ability to comprehend what is written. No one EVER wrote that Darnell DESERVED to be murdered. Everyone has been saying that the MURDER was predictable and avoidable due to his getting involved. Understand what you read, and please avoid replacing words in our thoughts to satisfy your own hate.
As to bringing the Halloween incident into this fray... nice try at playing yet another race card where it doesn't apply. You lose. Again. Doesn't it get tiring?
This is about parenting, not race. Grip.

"Please avoid replacing words in our thoughts to satisfy your own hate."

Purely laughable...Please, tell me what I've shown myself to hate. This will be interesting...

Also, show me where the article states that he hung around gang members....Please, show me...oh that's right...you are making an assumption that because someone got into a fight with a gang member, that they are themselves a gang member....as if gang members only target other gang members....I know that to not be the case, regardless of whether you do. I don't doubt that you will respond with another argument not based in sound logic....but I'll continue to pray for you nonetheless.:)

This is another case of blaming the victom. My deepest sympathy to the this woman for the loss of her son. Wouldn't it be wonderful if everyone could move out of the bad parts of town and into the lovely neighborhoods you all live in.

My parents always taught us to befriend anyone who needed a friend. Its sad this young man lost his life defending another. Had he been defending a youg white woman from an attack he would have been hailed as a hero. The fault is of the shooter, who had so little regard for life that he would shoot this kid in cold blood.

What about the case of the young football player who was shot to death in front of his home. To blame the parents because they cannot move their families out of the city they reside in is just ignorant. All while his mother was in Iraq fighting for your right to say such stupid things in this forum. By the way, ignorance is not just seen in the "bad neighborhoods". I work in the OC and see my share of stupid, spoiled kids who have that same disregard for the rights of others and sense of self entitlement. In fact that is a huge problem seen in this generation. Pull your heads out of your rears and think before you right. These problems are in the bad neighborhoods today. They will be in your neighborhoods tomorrow.

most of you sound SOOOOO stupid!!!! im a 21 yr old blk female.i grew up in the jordan down projects lived next door to a man thats on death row as we speak!!!! most of my male cousins are in gangs so does that make me a gang member and should i be gunned down for stopping a fight outside of my home and communicating with gang members???? who cares if he has talked to gang members!!! this boy was doing something that to many of us are afraid to do!!! he didnt deserve to die bottom line and his mother has the right to feel anyway she wants to!!!

wishing it would all end wrote:

most of you sound SOOOOO stupid!!!! im a 21 yr old blk female.i grew up in the jordan down projects lived next door to a man thats on death row as we speak!!!! most of my male cousins are in gangs so does that make me a gang member and should i be gunned down for stopping a fight outside of my home and communicating with gang members???? who cares if he has talked to gang members!!! this boy was doing something that to many of us are afraid to do!!! he didnt deserve to die bottom line and his mother has the right to feel anyway she wants to!!!

I'm not going to lose any sleep over it. I find this attitude pretty typical. A complete lack of appreciation for some excellent police work.

Hmmm wrote:

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When all else fails, whip out the race card... the "po' black folk" deal is so 1900's. Wake up! This is 2008!
Let me get you up to speed. Your SKIN COLOR no longer matters if you are WILLING to be productive. In 2008, a black person can be a Chief of Police. A black person can be a front-runner candidate for the most powerful nation this Earth has ever hosted. And yet you STILL complain.
When you have a child, you have 13 years to do something FOR THEM before they become teenagers and neighborhood influences take over. You can GO TO COLLEGE and get a degree (or several in 13 yrs). You CAN work your way out of that gang infested hood. If you don't do anything but sit and claim your problems are due to racism in exclusivity, then PLEASE do not come to us and cry when your child is killed in a gang fight!
LBPD tracked this killer all the way to Colton. LBPD NEVER gave up. Darnell's mom had her day in court. She was able to say "that's my son's killer sitting right there. He held the gun and pulled the trigger". She got that day in front of a jury because of LBPD detectives. They didn't work 24/7 on the case, but they never gave up, either.
Too many mistakes were made that minute, that hour, that day, and the months leading up to that day. LBPD did NOT force her to sign that rental agreement and move into that neighborhood. She should have done something with her life to afford the children she made a safer environment rather than buy them the latest XBox or $150 basketball shoes. Priorities were NOT in proper perspective. Her child was not properly TAUGHT that all of the pseudo-bravery and thug talk they hear all day in rap song after rap song will only get them killed in the end.
They will teach them to brush their teeth, tie their shoes. When they turn into young adults, they should have also been taught that taking care of your family sometimes means SHUTTING THE DOOR and staying out of harm's way. This young man was 21 years old. He had 3 solid years available to work full time and get his momma and his family out of that neighborhood.
They stayed. They spun the roulette wheel of "that only happens to other folk". They lost.
Skin color doesn't matter. If you WANT out, if you WANT a better life, a better neighborhood, society will let you. No one is keeping you from your dreams BUT YOU. You have to want it bad enough to do whatever it takes. 2 jobs, night classes at city college, whatever. They didn't want it bad enough. If only murder came with a mulligan.

Outstanding post!

Taxpayer wrote:

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Outstanding post!

Remarkably ignorant

Taxpayer, you are typically ignorant just like some of the other unappreciative, ungrateful members of the public I "serve" on a nightly basis. I do my job in spite of your ignorance & lack of support.

Johnny Law wrote:

Taxpayer, you are typically ignorant just like some of the other unappreciative, ungrateful members of the public I "serve" on a nightly basis. I do my job in spite of your ignorance & lack of support.

People need to pull themelves up by their own bootstraps and do what it takes to succeed. What is ignorant about that?

I don't see how I'm not being supportive of police? Please explain.

What I do think is that our society couldn't survive without the protection of police officers and I sincerely do appreciate their efforts. However, I don't appreciate berating people because of their lot in life as I've seen in other posts. There is a difference. Police work is difficult and I'm sure it takes a superior individual to skillfully perform the job right. People tend to complain when something is wrong and are silent when things are going well. If you aren't hearing lots of praise from the public, then maybe you are just doing a great job!

You have my total support for the difficult work that police officers perform. May the good guys win...by that I mean police officers!!!

XOXOXOXOXOXO (Hugs & Kisses)

Uhh,

What did Taxpayer say that you find typically ignorant Johnny Law? He tends to be pro-police and from what I have read of his posts, continues to be in this case. Could you have been mistaken?

I know this could be a "target rich" environment if you are in search of ignorance, but you gotta pick the right target!

Hmmm wrote:

<quoted text>
If discussing the TRUTH about what happened here is disrespectful to the dead, then allow us to be guilty as charged of disrespectfulness. We cannot help this woman now. We can only discuss what may have prevented it, and hopefully some poor single mother in a gang infested neighborhood will read our words and begin TODAY to work her way out of that situation before she loses her son too.
>To imply that someone deserved to be killed
Speaking of ignorance, ignorance also covers one's ability to comprehend what is written. No one EVER wrote that Darnell DESERVED to be murdered. Everyone has been saying that the MURDER was predictable and avoidable due to his getting involved. Understand what you read, and please avoid replacing words in our thoughts to satisfy your own hate.
As to bringing the Halloween incident into this fray... nice try at playing yet another race card where it doesn't apply. You lose. Again. Doesn't it get tiring?
This is about parenting, not race. Grip.

Yeah. Right. Next time the good citizens of Long Beach are attacked by a violent gang of rampaging "Blacks" they should just tell their mammas so that they can give them a good spanking. OH BROTHER!

Ronald

wishing it would all end wrote:

most of you sound SOOOOO stupid!!!! im a 21 yr old blk female.i grew up in the jordan down projects lived next door to a man thats on death row as we speak!!!! most of my male cousins are in gangs so does that make me a gang member and should i be gunned down for stopping a fight outside of my home and communicating with gang members???? who cares if he has talked to gang members!!! this boy was doing something that to many of us are afraid to do!!! he didnt deserve to die bottom line and his mother has the right to feel anyway she wants to!!!

wishing it would all end wrote:

most of you sound SOOOOO stupid!!!! im a 21 yr old blk female.i grew up in the jordan down projects lived next door to a man thats on death row as we speak!!!! most of my male cousins are in gangs so does that make me a gang member and should i be gunned down for stopping a fight outside of my home and communicating with gang members???? who cares if he has talked to gang members!!!

He didn't deserve to be raised in a gang-infested neighborhood. He didn't deserve to be raised without a father. He didn't deserve to be raised in poverty.
But he was.
You're right. His mother should be able to feel whatever she wants, but no matter how she feels, she failed him, just as some of your aunts and uncles are failing your cousins, and some of them will die too.
What do you care? Blacks kill blacks all the time. They write songs rooting each other on to kill each other, boasting about killing each other.
You have funerals and cry and things, but you really don't care, do you?
I always thought many african american gang members should get an honorary membership to the Ku Klux Klan. The Bloods really do excel at killing black people, and I think the Klan would welcome them, if not as brothers, at least as people who essentially have the same goals.

SMH at Ignorance wrote:

<quoted text>
"Please avoid replacing words in our thoughts to satisfy your own hate."
Purely laughable...Please, tell me what I've shown myself to hate. This will be interesting...

Well, I perceived that you carry over some strange hate from the Bixby beatings, or why else would you compare two such completely different situations? You obviously carry this around on your sleeve, waiting for the perfect chance to use it, yet in this instance, it was actually what was laughable, not my pointing out your obsession.

SMH at Ignorance wrote:

<quoted text>Also, show me where the article states that he hung around gang members....Please, show me...oh that's right...you are making an assumption that because someone got into a fight with a gang member, that they are themselves a gang member....as if gang members only target other gang members....I know that to not be the case, regardless of whether you do. I don't doubt that you will respond with another argument not based in sound logic....but I'll continue to pray for you nonetheless.:)

Umm... ok... lol... this gets stranger by the day. Perhaps in the future, before you throw your chest out and accuse someone of making something up, please READ THE ARTICLE FIRST. Read it two or three times if necessary... I am only responding to the direct details in this article. This murder is nearly 2 years old, so I would really have to assume that this is the most accurate information we are EVER going to have. It is also from the mother's point of view, so we are ACTUALLY QUOTING WHAT SHE SAYS!! Anyways, here you go...

>There was never any question about Darnell [not
>being an actual gang member], she insisted.

>He and his brothers have friends who are gang
>members[...]

The article also revealed that one of the ganster 'friends' was the catalyst for the fight, and was running in and out of Darnell's house while the fighting was coming to a head.

Ok, so listen, either you can read and participate in the discussion, or just sit and yell about Bixby.

I don't know why you insist on praying for me, but so be it. I will certainly be praying for your education so we can have educated discussions in the future. I won't be wasting any more of my time quoting the article we both have access to.

wishing it would all end wrote:

most of you sound SOOOOO stupid!!!![etc... snip ...]

If we're all so stupid, then surely you are our queen.

Don't try and tell me what gangsters do or don't do. I spent my 15th, 16th and 17th birthdays in the heart of F-Troop territory in Santa Ana. I attended Valley High School, the most notorious gangster ridden high school in Santa Ana at the time. I did my time, girlfriend. I also decided that I wanted out. I got a job at a gas station, bought a car, and commuted from Santa Ana everyday back to my hometown to attend Lakewood High School for my senior year. Shortly after that, I started my first business before I turned 18. I then went on to LBCC to study Small Business Administration. I crashed wherever necessary, friends, slept in my car, did what I had to do.

I have a son, just a few years younger than Darnell. He isn't dead. Why? Because his mother and I worked our arses off to keep him alive. We interfered. His friends were interrogated by us relentlessly. Many of his friends did not pass the tests, and he was not allowed to hang out with them. He may very well have spent his high school years as the dude with the most un-cool parents, but you know what? HE'S STILL ALIVE. He never got that chance to get into a car with a bunch of his drunk friends and end up dead. We interfered. He never went to that party where a bunch of bangers showed up and sprayed to crowd at random. We interfered. We parented. He has a live-in girlfriend now and they commute between here and Van Nuys. If he dies now, it's on him. We did what we were supposed to do. If he decides to start making friends with gangsters and ends up shot, it isn't going to bother me if the PD labels it 'gang-related' if it is, in fact, gang-related.

Why do all of you people try to minimize what went on here? You use terms like 'so what if he TALKED to gang members' or 'so what if he communicated with gang members'. That's NOT THE CASE. He was FRIENDS. These gangsters weren't people he saw walking down the street and said wassup to. These people hung out IN HIS HOUSE. Again, in the article, mom clearly states that although she wouldn't let Darnell go to the other 'troubled' kid's houses, she would allow them to come to hers.

I want to know... WHY??? A troubled kid is still trouble, whether at their own house or yours. My son found some troubled kids he wanted to be friends with. He wasn't allowed, PERIOD. These people didn't come in our house, and he didn't go to theirs.

One last thing for you, your highness. Please follow the thread, and understand we have already said that Darnell did NOT deserve to die. We are saying HIS DEATH WAS AVOIDABLE. Please argue that his death was UNavoidable, or stop arguing.

You all think Darnell went out a hero, defending his mother's pride. Naw... c'mon now. A hero is an Iraq soldier. A hero is a young man who sees his mom about to take a bullet and steps in front of her. Darnell disobeyed his mother's request that he go back in the house. Darnell is dead. Darnell was an idiot, and no hero I know of does such a damn foolish thing that ends up leaving his mother without his lookin' out. Forever.

Parents are not designed to exceed their children. Darnell should have been their to help his mother achieve better things in life, and to help her through her end of life. Instead, his stupidity caused her to attend his funeral. What a hero.

hmmm sweetie where did i tell you what "gangsters" do or dont do????? i know what they do cause i lived in one of the baddest places in the world!!!! the boy shot darnell once he was hit for disrespecting his mom as SHE said it had nothing to do with a gang!!! to say this kid was a idiot and blah blah blah is heartless!!! and most of you know if there was something going on in front of your house your first instinct is to go see whats going on!! i dont know what your arguement is towards what i said!!!! and dan NO ONE DESERVES to live in poverty and not have a dad around and be in a gang infested neighborhood!!! i didnt deserve it but i lived it!!! my dad wasnt there and it wasnt by choice!!! as i stated in lived alllll around gang members! the day after my single blk mother graduated college someone broke into our home and stole everything she worked so hard for!!! we packed what we had and moved to north long beach on a block filled with whites and mexicans and it wasnt any better than living in the projects!!! no where is safe!!!! blks,white,asians and mexicans gang members or not are dangerous...no matter how much a parents beats it in their kids heads a child will always follow what they want to do... and i also never stated he was a hero!!! so i think your arguement is towards others on this site cause eveything you said had nothing to do with what i talked about!!!! ITS JUST NOT ABOUT GANGSTERS!!!! some ppl are just sick and heartless gang banger or not!!!