Westmoreland Man, 71, Faces Murder Charge

What a horrible situation! There should be nothing that makes it worth killing your brother in law.

Kay M wrote:

What a horrible situation! There should be nothing that makes it worth killing your brother in law.

Kay, you hit it on the head. Its got to be a terrible terrible accident. Both these men were fun loving guys who adored each other. We have no idea how it happened or what happened. We are still waiting for answers. I hope that we get some answers soon because not knowing it what is hurting us all right now.

Was one a retired DC policeman? Was alcohol involved? Sad, Sad situation. Prayers to everyone

Their niece wrote:

<quoted text>
Kay, you hit it on the head. Its got to be a terrible terrible accident. Both these men were fun loving guys who adored each other. We have no idea how it happened or what happened. We are still waiting for answers. I hope that we get some answers soon because not knowing it what is hurting us all right now.

Neice,
I hope you get your answers! Like I said before, what ever was going on in their lives, it shouldn't be so bad that one has to kill the other. It turns my stomach everytime I think about it, and our family is greiving right along with you. We don't know what to do, who to be upset with. We hope J didn't suffer. My 5 year old called him "Grandpa." I hope all gets sorted out soon.

Bubba,
Did you know the 71 year old?

Bubba-yes he is a retired DC Policeman, do you know him?
Kay: You are making this horrible statement based on what you read in the news. The facts have not been made public but when they are, you will probably regret saying "it turns my stomach". You have assumed the worse without facts. Shame on you. There was no MALICE. See you Thursday?

imfamily--So was this an accidental shooting? When are they supposed to release information? It's just a shame that both families have to go through this. I knew Mr. Sandifier and he seemed like such a nice gentleman, as did his wife. It's just a shock to the area.

Today is the arraignment. We should have more information today. Our understanding is that there has been a large number of break ins in the area, my uncle is a retired police officer and obviously had a gun nearby. Joel and Ray were both sleeping in front of the tv from what we understand. We don't know what led to the actual incident but many believe that my uncle woke up and didn't recognize 'J'. Obviously its tragic, many tears shed for J and the light he brought to everyone's life. We are saddened by the loss in my aunts life and all our lives because we were all touched by Joel's laughter, sense of humor and kindness. We are stunned and believe my uncle is devastated by what is going on obviously. This is not to diminish any part of 'J's' death. There is plenty of love for the loss of life. We just don't know what led up to this. We don't know what is going to happen with any of this. Today J's wife will be at the arraignment to get answers herself. Tomorrow they will attend his service. Tomorrow the mourning will officially begin and for right now we all just want answers.
For those that know Mr Sandifer, he does not have the ability to do this in any part of his body. He has never been a violent man. Everyone is reeling and trying to put the pieces together. Until we know more its a terrible, tragic accident.

Their Niece, thanks for posting an update.

Imfamily, you may have misunderstood what I meant by "turns my stomach," I can't think about the moments leading up to the gun being fired. I never said, nor do I believe that this incident happened because of malicious intent. I was just expressing my feelings on losing someone I know. I hope this clarifies my previous post.

Can anyone give us an update on what happened at the arraignment? Has anything been clarified on what exactly happened?

I have know Ray for 40 years and I don't think he has it in him to killing anyone.Has anyone heard anything about the arraignment? Ray on the DC police force with my uncle.

No updates. Ray is still in jail. There has been a funeral for Joel.
Ray doesn't have it in him to kill anyone but somehow this has happened. Not much else to say except tragic.

Was't there a continuation of the arraignment today? Did anythng get resolved?
This all has to be a horrible, horrible accident.

I think at this point you should not be providing any more info than you already have. Are you responding to strangers or family? If family or friend, than call them. If you're responding to a stranger than ignore them and tell them to get a life and mind their own business.

Thier neice again wrote:

Today is the arraignment. We should have more information today. Our understanding is that there has been a large number of break ins in the area, my uncle is a retired police officer and obviously had a gun nearby. Joel and Ray were both sleeping in front of the tv from what we understand. We don't know what led to the actual incident but many believe that my uncle woke up and didn't recognize 'J'. Obviously its tragic, many tears shed for J and the light he brought to everyone's life. We are saddened by the loss in my aunts life and all our lives because we were all touched by Joel's laughter, sense of humor and kindness. We are stunned and believe my uncle is devastated by what is going on obviously. This is not to diminish any part of 'J's' death. There is plenty of love for the loss of life. We just don't know what led up to this. We don't know what is going to happen with any of this. Today J's wife will be at the arraignment to get answers herself. Tomorrow they will attend his service. Tomorrow the mourning will officially begin and for right now we all just want answers.
For those that know Mr Sandifer, he does not have the ability to do this in any part of his body. He has never been a violent man. Everyone is reeling and trying to put the pieces together. Until we know more its a terrible, tragic accident.

Have all family and friends forgotten, this is the world wide web and what is written here is for everyone to see. Please communicate by phone or email. This is not for the worlds eyes and neither are your opinions or theories. If you have a problem with this than shame on you.
RLSJR

I apologize. My initial reply was in the heat of the moment and in defense of assumptions. I was trying to clear the picture. Not all is black and white. I will not correct my original post but it was all the information that was assumed by another family member AT THAT TIME. I did not find out until later that it was an assumed story.
Just as you felt the need to respond not once but twice, I too felt the need to say something.
If you don't understand that then shame on you.

Kay M wrote:

What a horrible situation! There should be nothing that makes it worth killing your brother in law.

The wheels of justice grind slowly but exceedingly fine...Ray has smelled the last cherry blossom of his disgusting life...just praying he gets cancer while in jail

Joels California friend wrote:

Was't there a continuation of the arraignment today? Did anythng get resolved?
This all has to be a horrible, horrible accident.

There is a May 28th court date when this killer should breathe the last free air his lungs intake--Joels brother dave in chicago

Long time friend wrote:

I have know Ray for 40 years and I don't think he has it in him to killing anyone.Has anyone heard anything about the arraignment? Ray on the DC police force with my uncle.

Killer Ray has already admitted to the killing on tape, so clearly he does have it in him. Just wondering how many of his cop cases were tainted by this murderer, but am looking into it. Joels only brother, Dave

Can anyone from the family come out to my event? Please bring a picture ! Looking forward to hearing back from brother and family. Take care ! Katherine J. Cross
Re: "Candlelight Vigil" In Honor and Remembrance of Victims of Violent Crime & Family and Friends of Loved Ones Lost to Violence on Thursday April 30, 2009 at 6:30 pm Historical Westmoreland County Court House Montross Virginia Coordinated by the Cross Family In Loving Memory of their son and brother Paul Martin Cross and in Observance of "National Crime Victims Rights Week April 26 through May 2, 2009".(Please bring a picture or pictures of your loved one with you) For more information contact Katherine J Cross