fred buck frothing at the mouth

This evening my friend Lydia and I were eating double scoops of diet chocolate ice cream, topped with Cool Whip, when all at once Lydia asked:"Belinda, do you think Fred Buck, that lost, pathetic boy, is frothing at the mouth?" "Lydia," I replied, "if he is, we need to get Fred Buck to a vet for a series of distemper shots right away." But then, before we spend our hard-earned money on what very easily could be an incurable case, we decided to ask other Topix readers to please tell us their opinions. Is Fred Buck frothing at the mouth? If so, how can his empty, lonely soul be helped?

Wow... some people will do anything for attention... cant wait for Fred to reply to this.....

How dare you make such a post about such a kind and venerable person. Never known fred to say anything bad about anyone. And the pure strength of intellect oozes out of every word he posts...heh heh.

Berry wrote:

How dare you make such a post about such a kind and venerable person. Never known fred to say anything bad about anyone. And the pure strength of intellect oozes out of every word he posts...heh heh.

My gal pal Lydia told me only today over a banana split with a diet double-chocolate brownie base: "Belinda, Berry is a singularly bright young man, and he has a lucrative career awaiting him in satire."

belinda wrote:

<quoted text>
My gal pal Lydia told me only today over a banana split with a diet double-chocolate brownie base: "Belinda, Berry is a singularly bright young man, and he has a lucrative career awaiting him in satire."

You are too kind. I'll take one of the same...minus the diet.

Good times

Fred Buck wrote:

Good times

Late last night Lydia and I were looking through "Playgirl," hoping to see Sarah Palin's almost son-in-law naked, when suddenly I had a revelation.
"Lydia," I said. "I've realized why that poor lonely Fred Buck spends so much time posting drivel."
"Because his 'Playgirl' subscription ran out?" Lydia suggested.
"No, dear," I said, "but you're on the right track. Poor miserable Fred spends so much time at the keyboard because -- a lady hesitates to use the words, but I must -- all his sexual energy is misdirected."
"Oh, Belinda, that's brilliant!" Lydia exclaimed. "Tell the details! Tell! Tell!"
"Well, dear," I explained, blushing a little, "you're sophisticated enough to know Fred needs to be reintroduced to Merry Five Fingers."
Lydia gasped at my audacity in using such words and also at my acute insight. "Belinda," she said, quickly recovering,"brilliance like yours deserves another diet Russell-Stover nut cluster chocolate."

Your telling post makes me wonder the last time a decent man wanted to look at you or wanted to talk to either one of you. I would suggest smearing the diet ice cream all over yourselves, while remembering to place COOL WHIP on the naughty bits. Have you two ever concidered a career in radio?

Fred Buck wrote:

Your telling post makes me wonder the last time a decent man wanted to look at you or wanted to talk to either one of you. I would suggest smearing the diet ice cream all over yourselves, while remembering to place COOL WHIP on the naughty bits. Have you two ever concidered a career in radio?

"Lydia," I said, "that sorry son of a b*tch is comparing us to Molly and Donna! Those braying harpies!"

"No, dear," Lydia soothed. "Even poor, pathetic Fred Buck wouldn't sink that low."

"Why not?"

"Because even poor, rejected Fred Buck realizes that to be either Molly or Donna, you or I would have to have a cheap red dye job that leaves our roots exposed as gray."

"Lydia," I said, giggling, "you're a genius! Let's try this new British colonial recipe -- chocolate-covered lobster."

Fred Buck wrote:

Your telling post makes me wonder the last time a decent man wanted to look at you or wanted to talk to either one of you. I would suggest smearing the diet ice cream all over yourselves, while remembering to place COOL WHIP on the naughty bits. Have you two ever concidered a career in radio?

Lydia and I have reconsidered. Can you help us get a job on radio? We're sure you can, since obviously you're an expert on all subjects.

What is this trash??

slow but sure wrote:

What is this trash??

Well, sugar britches, what part is it that you don't understand?

slow but sure wrote:

What is this trash??

Trash, you're not far off. Although I was born and raised there, it would seem I don't have the right to say anything wrong say about my hometown . These pro Cushing barflies and their cesspool buddies are working hard to make Cushing an even creepier place than it is all ready is.

Fred Buck wrote:

<quoted text>Trash, you're not far off. Although I was born and raised there, it would seem I don't have the right to say anything wrong say about my hometown . These pro Cushing barflies and their cesspool buddies are working hard to make Cushing an even creepier place than it is all ready is.

Fred, dear, Lydia and I think we go a long, long way toward helping you prove your case. Not like that wretched Gina, with her two faces and five chins.