Is Phone Sex Really Cheating?

TriciaThePhoneSexOperator wrote:

That being said, Pamela and Flyboy, what do we say to the guys whose wives won't talk openly about these things? I used to be sort of black and white on the issue but now I see it as more complex. Women are FAR too often unreasonably closed-minded about men's sexuality and sexual needs. Saying that these men should 'fess up when it might very well be the end of their marriage or marital happiness and stability is kind of like suggesting they throw the baby out with the bath water, yes?
This issue is very frustrating and baffling to me. I wish men were better equipped to educate their wives/lovers on the reality of their sexuality so real common ground could be found but their shame and our culture makes it nearly impossible sometimes.

I really dont know, I mean Im not married or an expert on this subject. I think that a relationship does need to be very open about sexuality to stay strong, so I do realize when a man is being denied that he will get desperate and find some type of outlet for release. But I still dont think that is an excuse to cheat. The men just have to be upfront and honest about their feelings, and if the woman does not show the respect to listen and be understanding to the mans needs and desires, maybe they should take a break or see other people. Or go to a therapist so they can talk and hopefully feel more comfortable to another person about whats going wrong. Or maybe just try to spice things up somehow and see how receptive the woman is, sort of gently push her into seeing why doing what the guy wants would be fun for her.

TriciaThePhoneSexOperator wrote:

That being said, Pamela and Flyboy, what do we say to the guys whose wives won't talk openly about these things? I used to be sort of black and white on the issue but now I see it as more complex. Women are FAR too often unreasonably closed-minded about men's sexuality and sexual needs. Saying that these men should 'fess up when it might very well be the end of their marriage or marital happiness and stability is kind of like suggesting they throw the baby out with the bath water, yes?
This issue is very frustrating and baffling to me. I wish men were better equipped to educate their wives/lovers on the reality of their sexuality so real common ground could be found but their shame and our culture makes it nearly impossible sometimes.

I'm sorry, but it is really not complex. If you feel the need to hide what you're doing, it's cheating. Needs are a misnomer, men don't NEED sex of any kind, they WANT sex. Phone sex is not a need it is a desire they want to highten the sewxual tension and make a better orgasm. But if you do it behind your SO's back it is cheating.

Tanya wrote:

It is no more cheating than looking at pornography. I suppose it just depends on how secure you are in your relationship and how old fashioned your relationship ideals are for now. All I know, if it can get my husband going, is that I am all for it. I don't consider it cheating if it can't give me herpes.

It won't give you herpes all right but it is taking the most precious thing from you,your husband's attention and fantasy that belongs to you.

RealityDealer wrote:

No it is not cheating. Well to any person that is not the insane jealous type or a control freak.
However, phone sex can be quite expensive. It is legitimate for a wife or girlfriend to complain about outrageously expensive phone bills.

My husband won't be able to do that. I am good of tracking things.

P-S-S wrote:

<quoted text>
LOL! He's only to play doctor with me unless he thinks it's cool for me to play doctor with the boy down the block :D
Fair is fair after all.

Amen. If my hubby wants to play doctor,I will do the same to the handsome dude next door. I want to be a urologist. ;-)

I had phone sex with my ex boyfriend who lives 2000 miles away but we were roleplaying to be other people so i thought it was okay...now i feel so guilty because my boyfriend doesn't know I did this on the phone with my ex. What should I do?:'(

Tanya wrote:

It is no more cheating than looking at pornography. I suppose it just depends on how secure you are in your relationship and how old fashioned your relationship ideals are for now. All I know, if it can get my husband going, is that I am all for it. I don't consider it cheating if it can't give me herpes.

Looking at porn is in no way cheating, silliest thing I've ever heard. If there is another living person who you are interacting with, on the phone, texting, over the internet, I consider it cheating.

Filipino Love wrote:

No, it isn't! It's quite saving money and keeping things safe too yet it's not good to do it that way. It's really up to you...

Its emotional cheating. Which is as bad as physical cheating.

ben jij echt ottelline postma die ik ken?

Personally to me, it isn't cheating. Its a lot harder to think your partner has had physical contact than just a few words of what would happen if single. Its a fantasy , let's face it most boys see a hot girl and think sex! That's a fantasy so is that cheating?
People know whether they've cheated ! I've had phone sex why upset my partner by telling him I love him and couldn't touch anyone else ! It all depends whether u act on it in the end...

As a phone sex operator, it depends on your wifes POV. Am completely serious. Some guys I talk to have completely open relationships with their wives and their wives don't care - some guys are 100% secretive from their wives because they know their wives would leave them for even thinking about phone sex. One of those "do you feel lucky, punk" situations.

However just because it is or isn't cheating doesn't mean not to DO it - guys need a release that sometimes their wives can't provide (especially if they're into something too taboo that their wife would never be into!)