A Family Apart

This is a nice story. I am wondering, though, who proofread the header? Mother Copes In Her Husband's ABSENSE.?? How did this get ny the spell checker?

Well done Buck...I read this piece and wept the entire time...the TRUTH of the suffering of our own because of this war...needs to be told....over and over and over...we owe these families that....and so much more

the pain this couple live came right off the pages of your piece.......and it is REAL...

and i believe these families deserve a bit more, than a welcome home party ..with a phone number to call in case readjustment gets diffiuclt..

BUCK...Keep up the good work.

Sirs
The Courant is using military families to promote a left wing, anti war message. How low can they go?.
Obviously the soldiers would be prefer to be back home but their Army careers come first. This is understood when a soldier volunteers for duty. It is clearly spelled out and the Courant knows it.
Rather than focussing on the seperation caused by deployement it would be a nice if the Courant ran a front page article applauding all the good that these soldiers are doing for the cause of world peace.
Thank you to the Military Families who have given so much. Shame on you to the Courant and the rest of the Tribune companies.

This man, and his family, are doing Gods work. The faces of these children he is healing, saving and educating, the intense relief on the faces of their mothers and family, the gratitufe that eminates from the smiles of the medical 'personnel' he is training overseas....amazing. The Peace Corps does similar work. We need more stories such as this, about the dedication, humanity and saving nature of the work our troops are doing overseas.
He and his family are in my prayers, as they do what none of us can or will.
Peace be with you Hoekman's.

And to "Miss You", above: They can try to package it anyway they want, but Readers without agenda's see the true story below the headline. This story had more errors than just what was pointed out in the misspelled headline. But the truth is in there for those who seek it.

Great Story! When I was gone in Iraq for a year, my wife went through similar challenges. As hard as it was, we both grew considerably during that year apart, and those strengths are still part of us today.

To the Hoekman's--Thank you for your service to our nation and the world.

To the reporter--You did a fine job at caputuring the sacrifice of our brave service members and families. We who support our military and the necessity of military action can recognize the sacrifice and know it is worth it.

Since when does the choice to serve and get paid for it,health and housing benefits,pensions,government commisaries and other tax payer perks,amount to "sacrifice"? Do we not choose our vocations,jobs,trades and professions?;and when we enter the work force,is that a so called "sacrifice"? I'm sure that many arm chair Guardsmen never anticipated deployment but rather donut eating weekend warrior status. But to demean both the choice to serve as an employment choice and to propogandize the current geopolitical climate by the left wing moveon.org Courant,is deplorable.

What an amazing story and how God has seen them through!

During the same webcam interview, Hoekman said he believes that, compared to him, "Lori had by far the harder job over the past 15 months, raising three children alone." One of Hoekman's Navy friends returned from a 15-month deployment like his, only to discover that his marriage had collapsed. Many members of his unit, Hoekman said, are on their third long deployment in five years, "and you can't maintain a family on that basis."

I watch, in amazement, my daughter in law when my son is deployed. She is responsible for the house, the children, the bills, the dog, the cars and every crisis that comes their way. The families deserve every bit of support they can get during these times. The wives are truly the unsung heros.
God bless them all and watch over all of our military families.

It is interesting that those who have no use for "the Left" see it in EVERYTHING. STOP. This is a piece about what a Military Family is going through and their challenges. If you don't like it buy another paper...

Please don't make martyrs out of military spouses and their families. I was one for 41 years, with all the threats and realities of separation that go with it. Military spouses know the downsides from day one. No sympathy, please, only understanding, and some help when needed.

A powerful story of the human spirit.

God Bless

thank you to all the brave service-persons and their families for keeping us all safe ... i constantly pray for the families that have lost love ones so my children sleep peacefully every night

Very emotional, uplifting and encouraging story. Rarely, and unfortunately, in our history have there been times when families weren't torn apart by war. Even during peace time military service can test the strength of marriages and relationships. It's very tough on all involved.

Shirley wrote:

Please don't make martyrs out of military spouses and their families. I was one for 41 years, with all the threats and realities of separation that go with it. Military spouses know the downsides from day one. No sympathy, please, only understanding, and some help when needed.

No one is making martyrs out of anyone. The spouses are often forgotten.

Rinker Buck once again shows his compassion for families impacted by the separation and anxieties of our present war. He has the unique storytelling talent to illuminate the emotional and practical struggles of Lori, Nikolas and their children, so that we too share their ordeal. Thank you for highlighting such a moving story on your front page.

wow! this is the first story printed by the courant that i took so long to read, because i had to keep stopping to wipe the tears away, and recompose myself.. it is because my sister was deployed to Germany for 2 yrs. during cold war. back then, no bullets were flying, but possibility was constantly there. i can now consider myself a wimp, for complaining about life's up's and down's, while true heroes right here in CT deal with the hardest job of all, raising healthy, smart children despite adversity. if i had known of this family's hardship, i would be there in a flash to help. i too was raised in rural us, where we always stopped when someone was stopped on side of road. helping is second nature to most of us. but is first nature for this family. thank you for an uplifting, emotional story i (we) can base our lives on and strive to model ourselves on.

Shirley wrote:

Please don't make martyrs out of military spouses and their families. I was one for 41 years, with all the threats and realities of separation that go with it. Military spouses know the downsides from day one. No sympathy, please, only understanding, and some help when needed.

Your comments surprise me. First, as a military spouse, you must admit that although the families go into the life knowing, on a intellectual level, what's ahead, there is no way that they can really know until they have lived it.
Second, you sound almost angry that this family is getting recognition. As a military spouse I would think that you would be happy that this families experience is being explained and shared with the general public.

I had to read this story again. It is so amazing to hear about the work Lori's husband is doing in Afghanistan.
It really drives home for me the incredible impact we are having on the people over there. What would happen if we were not there?? The medical care they are receiving is bar-none superior to anything they have ever had. The education, the capcity building. We are right to be doing this. For so long this has been the work of Nonprofits and religious missionary's, but now, we are helping advance an important cause and bring life and self sustanence to a third world country. How incredibly powerful.
My heart goes out to Lori. Thank you for your strength and courage in offering your family for this opportunity. I know your faith has brought you through and helped you to choose this life's challenge. I only wish I was brave enough and faithful enough to join you. In my shamefulness I send blessings to your family. I and others like me, owe you a great debt of service. And the Afghan people will be forever changed by your compassion, caring and sacrifice.

Maroon wrote:

During the same webcam interview, Hoekman said he believes that, compared to him, "Lori had by far the harder job over the past 15 months, raising three children alone." One of Hoekman's Navy friends returned from a 15-month deployment like his, only to discover that his marriage had collapsed. Many members of his unit, Hoekman said, are on their third long deployment in five years, "and you can't maintain a family on that basis."
I watch, in amazement, my daughter in law when my son is deployed. She is responsible for the house, the children, the bills, the dog, the cars and every crisis that comes their way. The families deserve every bit of support they can get during these times. The wives are truly the unsung heros.
God bless them all and watch over all of our military families.

The wives deserve the support but the funny thing is, the military doesn't provide ANY support.