for 66 Years, the Gastons have Kept Their Vows to Cherish and to Love: a Valentine so sweet, tender

Charlotte.com

February 13, 2008

IN MY OPINION A Valentine so sweet, tender College sweethearts found romance that still endures Henry and Judy Gaston are the faces of Valentine's Day.

They've been married 66 years and are still lovebirds.

Not in a showy, sugar-coated sentimental way. Their affection has depth and quiet dignity.

The Gastons are my old friends and I've heard the story of their romance many times. But they're such interesting people that new currents spring up whenever they re-tell parts of it for me.

I used to see Henry often. From 1989 until 2002, he wrote a weekly column for the Observer's Gaston and Lincoln section. I hadn't visited with the Gastons in a long time and recently dropped by their home outside McAdenville.

Henry -- a former teacher, elementary school principal and homespun philosopher -- is 91. Judy -- former guidance counselor at South Point High School -- turns 91 on July 18. They were both in good spirits.

We sat around the kitchen table as the Gastons' son, David, a retired elementary school band teacher/director from Newton, fixed salads, stew beef and rice. He set a bowl of fresh apple slices on the table for us.

As usual, Henry wore his homemade bib overalls.

'Tell Joe what day it is' he said to Judy.

'Friday date night,' she replied.

This was a tradition, they said, that started when they were students at Berea College in Kentucky. Friday nights were the only time male students were allowed in the parlor of women's dorms.

The Gastons took me back to those days -- a time when they were just falling in love.

Getting together

Growing up on a Gaston County farm, Henry was the youngest of nine children. Berea was a good choice for him because he could work his way through college -- a big help to his dad in those Depression years.The college was founded in 1855 and charges no tuition, its Web site says. It admits only academically promising students, mostly from Appalachia and with limited finances.

Judy lived about 45 miles from Berea in the small town of Crab Orchard. Her mother, a teacher, had died in the 1918 flu epidemic. It was a given, Judy said, that she'd also be a teacher.

The Kentucky girl and the North Carolina farm boy started moving in the same direction: Berea.

Music and luck brought them together.

Now Henry has written about all this in his columns. It is, in a way, almost part of the local folklore.

I never get tired of hearing about how he crooned 'Stardust' at a freshman program in a borrowed white suit. And how Judy, watching from the audience, told her friends: 'Hands off, girls, this one's mine.'

Judy told me how they first met -- in a German class, where Henry sat down in front of her. She complimented him on his plaid tie.

'You can have it,' Henry said. And he gave her the tie.

The knot that would bind them together began to take shape.

It grew stronger during their college days. Henry often serenaded Judy outside her dorm window, probably with 'Stardust.'

Or he might do 'Rose-Marie,' a love song from the latest Nelson Eddy and Jeanette McDonald movie.

How did that one go? Henry started singing it for me. Judy smiled. They were kids again.

The courtship lasted for about seven years. On April 17, 1941, Henry and Judy exchanged marriage vows before a Baptist preacher in Gaffney, S.C.

For years, the couple farmed. Money was tight, so when Valentine's Day rolled around, she made cards for him. Henry wrote notes expressing his feelings toward her.

'They were treasures,' Judy said. 'I've still got some. But they're not for viewing.'

I asked if they ever exchanged flowers at Valentine's. No, they hadn't. They'd been in the flower business at one point, raising gladiolas, or 'glads.'

The Gastons talked about gladiolas like the flowers were right there in their hands. Growing them was a pleasure even though it brought little profit.

Henry hauled a truckload of gladiolas to a Charlotte florist one time and was insulted by the low price offered. He brought the load home and gave away the flowers to friends and neighbors.

The Gastons also experimented with herbs, tomatoes and sweet potatoes.

Farming was a great experience. But with a growing family, the day came when they had to rethink things. The Gastons enrolled at Appalachian State Teachers College to renew their teaching certificates and work on master's degrees.

To make college affordable, they converted an old school bus into living quarters, complete with a shower and porch. They more or less camped out in Boone for four summers with four children.

Some folks might see that as a hardship. For the

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